r/HermanCainAward Prey for the Lab🐀s Jan 07 '22 Silver 1 Gold 1 Helpful 3 Wholesome 1

Former nurse and uber Christian anti-vaxxer believed we were living in the Last Days. Turns out it was just HER last days. Awarded

10.5k Upvotes

2.5k

u/fknbtch 🙏 Don't Work But 💉 Do Jan 07 '22 Helpful Take My Energy Doot 🎵 Doot

Too dumb to realize she was the exact person George Carlin was talking about.

251

u/clearlybaffled Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

That Carlin was an atheist and democrat was completely lost on her.

127

u/NMT-FWG Jan 07 '22

Yeah, the whole "critical thinking" while saying the earth is 5,000 years old and that dinosaurs weren't real doesn't quite fit the bill.

31

u/_Reddit-Troll Jan 07 '22

Those folks are weak minded and easily molded. They tend to follow any crazy theory out there and don't research it.

16

u/lawgeek Team Mix & Match Jan 07 '22

In many cases it is fear that brings them there in the first place. Fear of death. Someone comes along and tells them "death isn't real, you're going to live forever in heaven with everyone you've ever loved." It's such a comforting thought.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

1.1k

u/Gizmo1978 Jan 07 '22

Yeah it’s mind blowing. She posts all this god/Jesus garbage and then a Carlin quote who railed against religion.

364

u/CripplinglyDepressed Jan 07 '22

As a massive Carlin fan, honestly what bothered me the most was the fact that it’s not even the correct/real quote. It’s a paraphrase of a famous bit he had

278

u/wafflesareforever Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

Carlin would hate knowing that these morons are using him. It's like when Trump plays music at his rallies by artists who hate everything he stands for.

190

u/FatShibaBalls Jan 07 '22

Dude HATED republicans. Makes sense because all they were trying to do back then was cancel him for using naughty words (towards them)

79

u/ShotNeighborhood6913 Jan 07 '22

Ah yes. The evil satanic libruls using naughty words to unravel the very fabric of polite and civil society.
Why must they torment our gentile ears with such a hateful cacophony? Is it because they hate baby jesus? eagle screeches Join us today as we buy politicians with lobbyists with the last bit of food pantry money we extorted from state dependent meth heads in kentucky because walmart needs all employees to need welfare. Apple pie and firearms. Amen.

→ More replies

37

u/undeniablybuddha I'm too Vaxxy for my shirt Jan 07 '22

I always found it hilarious that Trump would walk out to a rally with "Macho Man" by the Village People

→ More replies
→ More replies

44

u/MisterNoisewater Jan 07 '22

Like how Paul Ryan is a huge Rage Against the Machine fan. Like, dude, you ARE the machine you Eddy Munster fuckface.

→ More replies

21

u/tags25 Jan 07 '22

But he would have loved the part where Covid was killing them. Talk about a lot of material - he would have gone OFF.

→ More replies
→ More replies

162

u/alterom Jan 07 '22

Well, eh, close enough:

You know what they want? They want obedient workers. Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now they’re coming for your Social Security money. They want your retirement money. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? They’ll get it. They’ll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! It's a big club, and you ain’t in it!

I'll take it. At least he was saying something to that regard. Way better than when a random stupid-ass "quote" is slapped onto an image of a famous person who has nothing to do with it.

The fun part is that the actual quote was edited to conform to the Republican agenda of obediently accepting shittier jobs for lower pay :D

113

u/IJustLoggedInToSay- Team Mix & Match Jan 07 '22

The changes were thoughtful, though - whoever made that meme.

They got rid of the word "workers" and replaced it with "voters" and also replaced "just smart enough to run the machines" to "just smart enough to pay taxes". Can't have a meme that mentions workers, can we?

42

u/PM_ME_YOUR_ROTES Jan 07 '22

Image macro. Pure propaganda.

This thing is the memetic equivalent of a rat that that just got snatched by an owl.

20

u/chaogenus Jan 07 '22

The changes were thoughtful

And perhaps deceitful. The meme is political and suggests the source of our woes are the politicians, while Carlin's actual statement suggested that the politicians were irrelevant and we should forget about them.

→ More replies
→ More replies

45

u/chaogenus Jan 07 '22

Well, eh, close enough:

No, not close enough, you skipped the context leading to the quote and lost one of the most important sentences in the diatribe, "Forget the politicians, they're irrelevant, the politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice ... you don't. You have no choice, you have owners, they own you, they own everything."

The full clip is only 5 minutes and I suggest people watch the clip and avoid out of context truncated snippets and paraphrased rewrites. And keep in mind that, as much as we love Carlin, he is a cynical comedian doing a show.

The irony here is that the misquoted paraphrasing and skipped context plays right into the hands of the owners. Get the masses to attack their own governing systems to create an ever greater vacuum to be filled. Instead of perhaps getting the masses to participate in ownership.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

651

u/Raccoon_Full_of_Cum Satan Gained a Fleshlight Jan 07 '22

Self awareness has never been the strong suit of the religious.

300

u/icantswimnow Jan 07 '22

It's frighteningly amazing how they easily manage to interpret these things in a way to fit their bias.

217

u/NotHardcore Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22 Helpful

I dont even know how to talk to people that bought in. They work on a different set of scientific rules than I do. I can't use facts because it's fake. Disregarding the foundations of science. What do I do with that? Information can change, we adjust and continue. We don't just dogmatically hold the line in science, that's a more political and religious thing. It doesn't mean science is wrong because last week the CDC said one thing, then made amendments to the thing and came up with different information this week. Sometimes things change in a week. New studies, variants, and gathering information changes things. It doesn't mean they don't know what they're doing.

87

u/A-Movie Jan 07 '22

You've done everything you can. It's the same as dealing with every other type of self-destructive personality. Walk away and live your life.

→ More replies

63

u/SpaceJesusIsHere Jan 07 '22

For me, it always comes back to this quote. It's about antisemitism, but it perfectly explains most far right discourse.

Never believe that anti-Semites are completely unaware of the absurdity of their replies. They know that their remarks are frivolous, open to challenge. But they are amusing themselves, for it is their adversary who is obliged to use words responsibly, since he believes in words. The anti-Semites have the right to play. They even like to play with discourse for, by giving ridiculous reasons, they discredit the seriousness of their interlocutors. They delight in acting in bad faith, since they seek not to persuade by sound argument but to intimidate and disconcert. If you press them too closely, they will abruptly fall silent, loftily indicating by some phrase that the time for argument is past.

Jean-Paul Sartre

18

u/NotHardcore Jan 07 '22

Space Jesus dropping truth bombs in the form of quotes.

→ More replies

23

u/PunktualPenguin Jan 07 '22 Silver

Triage.

You can waste all of your time trying to save ONE that is too far gone and end up losing a lot of others that aren't that bad.

Or...

You can focus on all of the people that can actually be saved.

Don't let the blackholes consume you. Realize who they are, explain your position and move on.

→ More replies

12

u/realparkingbrake Jan 07 '22

I dont even know how to talk to people that bought in.

If you try talking to them, you can hear and see them be confused for a moment, and then identify you as one of them and shut down like you just spit on their shoe. They are locked into a tribal mentality, and anyone who doesn't share their delusional beliefs is at best a dupe, but possibly an active enemy.

I have friends with strong religious beliefs, and I have no problem dealing with them because their beliefs don't include thinking their faith will save them from disease. These people who think God will personally reach down and cure them because their friends and neighbors prayed for them have taken their hands off the wheel of rationality. Do they have a right to believe that? Sure. But I have the right to pity them for choosing to stop thinking and make life-and-death decisions on the basis of what I increasingly regard as superstition.

→ More replies
→ More replies

79

u/lkmk This isn't over! ✊️✊️✊️ Jan 07 '22

Case in point: the meme posted in slide 17 about believing in a political ideology... when believing life begins at conception is a political ideology.

→ More replies

30

u/Goose_o7 I am The TOOTH FAIRY! Jan 07 '22

Self awareness has never been the strong suit of the religious.

Not to mention that their actions in life are far more qualifying for an eternity in HELL than Heaven by a long mile!

This one got FLUSHED down to the Sewer Treatment Plant in Hell with all the other Trump TURDS.

→ More replies
→ More replies

115

u/Sadamatographer Jan 07 '22

I don’t think it’s even an accurate Carlin quote. The first half is but then it goes on about shittier jobs, lower pay etc.

114

u/alterom Jan 07 '22 Silver

Actual quote:

You know what they want? They want obedient workers. Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now they’re coming for your Social Security money. They want your retirement money. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? They’ll get it. They’ll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! It's a big club, and you ain’t in it!

From "American Dream"

29

u/urlond Jan 07 '22

They call it the American dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it!

→ More replies
→ More replies

58

u/Bambieyedbiotch Jan 07 '22

Did she vote for free college I wonder? Since she thinks we all need to be educated I hope she’s not listening to a bunch of community college drop outs.

36

u/Pink_Sprinkles_Party Jan 07 '22

I love it when hardcore right wingers always reference George Carlin. His views were pretty much opposite of theirs.

154

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

[deleted]

89

u/alterom Jan 07 '22

Life begins before conception.

Let's go one step further. A child can't be born if two people don't have sex to conceive.

Refusing sex is, therefore, murder.

Same goes for telling your children to stay abstinent until marriage. That's practically genocide, if you count each year as a pregnancy opportunity missed.

55

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

[deleted]

31

u/IJustLoggedInToSay- Team Mix & Match Jan 07 '22

Every sperm is sacred!

12

u/realparkingbrake Jan 07 '22

Every sperm is sacred!

Every sperm is great.

If a sperm is wasted,

God gets quite irate.


Great song, Python at its best.

→ More replies
→ More replies

34

u/Gingevere Jan 07 '22

"Life" isn't even the appropriate thing to be arguing about.

If "life" was the valuable part they'd all be vegans and protesting against people's right to have DNRs, for free healthcare, and for free indefinite care for coma patients.

→ More replies
→ More replies

25

u/umchoyka Jan 07 '22

Christianity was in support of abortions until the mid-late 70's, then some enterprising asshole priest realized he could use it as a firebrand to control his flock.

12

u/tracygee Jan 07 '22

To be fair, Catholics were always anti abortion, but to the fundamentalist Christians it was definitely a "Catholic issue" and not something that they were virulently against until the politics entered into it in the late 70s. Until then it was about doing what was best for mother and child -- and that included abortion if the mother was unable to handle being pregnant.

→ More replies
→ More replies

51

u/BorisTheMansplainer Horse Paste Taste Tester Jan 07 '22

Conservatives love George Carlin, George Orwell, etc. Do you think if Bernie Sanders's first name was George they would like him? 🤔

32

u/diemos09 Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

They would only like him if his first name was Colonel.

12

u/BeedoBeedoBoi Jan 07 '22

Bernie should just hard rebrand as Bernard and watch the especially gullible ones flip immediately haha

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

1.4k

u/Vernerator 💉💉>🧟‍♀️🧟‍♂️ Jan 07 '22

So…By her assessment, God Almighty didn’t think she deserved to continue to live. Who am I to argue with Him?

590

u/AidanCues Jan 07 '22

I hate the way it's two pronged idiotic reasoning.

  1. God will save me

Or

  1. God didn't save them, he must need them in heaven for a special task.

Eejits

174

u/natalie_la_la_la Jan 07 '22

My brother says if god gives him covid then thats what god wanted but hes going to continue going out maskless to huge events and deny that covid kills even though 3 ppl we know have died from covid already...

131

u/wintercast Jan 07 '22

And I don't get it. Someone could say God gave them masks and a vaccine.

It's like the person on the roof of their house in a flood. Praying for God to save them. A boat comes by - no I'm waiting for God, a helicopter comes - no I'm waiting on God. Flood waters rise and the guy drowns. Gets to heaven - person's asks good why he did not save them. God says - I sent you a boat and a helicopter.

56

u/natalie_la_la_la Jan 07 '22

Yea everytime i start getting closer to god then i hear some stupid shit and pull away. These ppl dont make sense.

57

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22 Take My Energy

No one is better at turning people away from Christianity then evangelicals.

51

u/MartianTea 💉Vax yo self before you wax yo self Jan 07 '22

I'll never go to church again after this or look at a person who does the same way again.

52

u/DrPockyy Jan 07 '22

Same. In fact, I am wary of anyone who proclaims themselves to be “patriot” or “Christian.”

27

u/TheDakestTimeline My ECMO goes to 11 Jan 07 '22

Both just dog whistles and virtue signals

→ More replies
→ More replies

19

u/wintercast Jan 07 '22

I grew up with religion, but I'm atheist now.

→ More replies
→ More replies

20

u/woodnymph1809 Jan 07 '22

That is brainwashed at it's finest. And they call the vaccinated sheep for understanding how medical science works and trusting the professionals, but they aren't the sheep for listening to people who have no proof of their claims. So sad that they can be convinced to not protect themselves.

→ More replies

14

u/nolzach Just for the Cookies 🍪 Jan 07 '22

I am so sorry that you have to deal with that within your family. I can imagine how frustrating that must be. I get frustrated with people who are vaxxed and act recklessly.

→ More replies

9

u/xian Jan 07 '22

sounds like God wants him to get covid

→ More replies

54

u/Sharkbait1737 Jan 07 '22

God didn’t save the people who agree with me because he must need them in heaven for a special task.

God didn’t save the people who don’t agree with me because they’re miserable sinners who are being punished and sent to hell.

LoGiK

→ More replies

183

u/Plaitmaker Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

Sweeping and vacuuming. The amount of dog hair in heaven is unbelievable.

83

u/Ipeteverydogisee Jan 07 '22

I completely believe this! 🐶

30

u/greeneyedwench Jan 07 '22

Username checks out!

→ More replies
→ More replies

34

u/icantswimnow Jan 07 '22

He works in mysterious ways, you know.

75

u/rgraz65 Jan 07 '22

How else could they still have people being suckered in...er...belonging to their church? If they live, it's because of the love of the invisible guy, and if they die, it's because of the love of the invisible guy.

It's pretty easy being that kind of god. You can not show up, not do anything, not help anyone, and if the person dies, its because you loved them so much you wanted them around.

82

u/zzombiebunny Jan 07 '22

It's like being a child. You don't have to make decisions, take responsibility or take risk, it's on your parents. God is a substitution for parents 🤷🏼‍♀️

29

u/TigerLily98226 Jan 07 '22 To The Stars

Exactly! Religious fanaticism is to avoid being a fully functioning, responsible adult. That’s why it’s so alluring to people who find life as an adult more than they can bear. They choose a path that tells them what to think, what to read, what to watch, what to listen to, who to love, who to marry, where to spend money, what to believe in, what and who to hate, and if you do it all perfectly and talk about it incessantly God will single you out as special and protect you above others, or kill you so you can be an “angle” in heaven above.

→ More replies

18

u/TheDakestTimeline My ECMO goes to 11 Jan 07 '22

I've never seen my xtian doctor mom so mad as when I uttered the phrase sky daddy

→ More replies

64

u/kittenpettingfool Jan 07 '22

Oh my fuck- the way they justify and defend him giving all the terminally ill kids a slow, agonizing death before they're even able to see the world (or anyone who just gets dealt shit hand after shit hand with no reprieve).

So infuriating and unacceptable.

39

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

[deleted]

20

u/merryone2K Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

And then there's that part in Matthew 24; "But of that day and hour, no one knows, not even the angels of heaven nor the Son, but the Father alone."
They keep thinking it's the end times, and pointing to "evidence". It would be funny if it weren't so damn sad.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

23

u/Sharkbait1737 Jan 07 '22

And presumably, if he wants you around in heaven he could make you die peacefully in your sleep, rather than (just by way of example) drowning you slowly via COVID whilst your family watch you suffer through your final days hooked up to a ventilator gasping for every last breath?

→ More replies

21

u/KnottShore Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

"... the nice thing about citing God as an authority is that you can prove anything you set out to prove. It’s just a matter of selecting the proper postulates, then insisting that your postulates are ‘inspired.’ Then no one can possibly prove that you are wrong.“

— Robert A. Heinlein, book If This Goes On—

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

222

u/-TDS21- Jan 07 '22

You get an amen!

184

u/Asleep-Scratch3366 Jan 07 '22

All I can muster is a Ramen. Praise be his noodly appendages.

31

u/VincentAdultman-1 Jan 07 '22

Mmm…ramen 🤤🍜

13

u/Yasea Team Mix & Match Jan 07 '22

Is ramen part of Pastafarianism? It's at least pretty close.

→ More replies

8

u/Immoracle Jan 07 '22

I'll take Ramen over Amen any day of the week!

→ More replies

49

u/ParadiseLosingIt Jan 07 '22

No, she wrote “ a Amen”. /s

38

u/i8bb8 Jan 07 '22

She has chosen...poorly.

→ More replies
→ More replies

24

u/reichjef Jan 07 '22

Yup, she’s in hell right now.

20

u/JLlo11 Thrice marked by the beast Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

She also thinks Americans are champing at the bit to buy products made in America with the proper labor costs associated.

23

u/bestleftunsolved Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

Assuming "champing at the bit". But this idea does seem to make a regular appearance. Since when have I seen maglites jumping off the shelf, when the chinese flashlight right next to it is 3x less expensive. Tell me these folks really care. Everything in their beloved Walmart is made in China.

I do think we need (probably subsidized) manufacturing, because one of the primary problems is the lack of good jobs, which the RW has somehow blamed on the dems. For starters we should make our own medical supplies.

→ More replies
→ More replies

86

u/BikerRay Jan 07 '22

The common thread in every one of these is religious fanaticism. Starting to think prayers don't work!

28

u/nads786 Jan 07 '22

As someone who was not raised Christian, I'm really hoping all these examples are massive outliers. "Real Christians" hopefully do not believe in this miracle all saving God bullcrap.

37

u/monty_kurns Jan 07 '22

What you see here aren't outliers but instead are very focused on evangelicals who promote the idea of divine intervention and a God who actively makes things happen. The Catholic Church and Latter Day Saints (Mormons) both officially back getting vaccinated. Those who think God will save them generally take that stance to absolve themselves of any responsibility.

→ More replies

30

u/Sharkteeth127 Jan 07 '22

I'm really hoping all these examples are massive outliers.

Weeeeelllll

I would think so, but unfortunately, I have met very few Christians in the US who embody the kind of Christianity that is mainly a means to better oneself.

There is such a hot mess of in-your-face piousness that is completely contrary to what faith should be; and it has some very harsh social pressures built in. One meets someone new, and is actually asked, out loud and in public, "which church are you going to?" (my shock over that should make it crystal clear that I am not originally from the US).

And then there is a big group of 'Qristians', as I read it a couple of days ago - and this word is fantastic as a descriptor of a certain segment of hate-christians who use their perverted cult as a means to oppress and subjugate others while feeling saved and secure.

The last group is part and parcel of the Trumpster cult; carefully encouraged and tended to by politicians who know very well that one can sell someone anything, anything one wants if it is based on an emotional belief system, and kept away from logic and rational decisions.

→ More replies

24

u/BubbaSawya Jan 07 '22

No such thing as a real Christian, a real Christian would believe in the words of Jesus and try to live up to them.

Instead, “Christians” are Republicans. They disagree with Christ all day every day.

→ More replies
→ More replies

17

u/Ragingredblue 🐎Praise the Lord and pass the Ivermectin!🐆 Jan 07 '22

Up until that point, Jesus sounded like kind of an asshole.

12

u/ClassicT4 Jan 07 '22

“Blah, blah, blah… mysterious ways… blah, blah… God’s plan…”

8

u/BrownEggs93 Jan 07 '22

No, no, no! These people are always an exception! Always.

→ More replies

266

u/Eye-Eye-Capn Jan 07 '22

Lol at slide 7. Carlin was talking about HER! Do they know he was an atheist? Talk about dumb folks.

75

u/poodlered Jan 07 '22

They’d share a picture of Richard Ramirez if someone put text on it that works for them.

32

u/chairmanmyow Jan 07 '22

Can we, uh, get to work on this?

→ More replies
→ More replies

674

u/Shady_Garden Go Give One Jan 07 '22

I’m so fucking sick of religious loons.

126

u/Jman5 Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

So are an increasing number of Americans.

It's been dropping by a fairly steady 1% per year for a while now.

77

u/DamnYouSexyFlanders Jan 07 '22

Haha, the poor persecuted and cancelled christians is now a minority of only 63%. 🙃

Yes! It's a /s of course

47

u/Jman5 Jan 07 '22

The irony is that the decline is largely of their own doing. When Evangelical Protestants became overtly political and partisan it began to drive out a good chunk of Americans. It is hard for religious liberals to feel included when their peers are denouncing them as literal demons. They then go further and blame them for their problems instead of taking any sort of responsibility for their actions.

Had they taken a more politically neutral or inclusive route, they likely would have followed the Catholic trend which has remained largely flat in recent decades.

→ More replies
→ More replies
→ More replies

150

u/SageofTime64 Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

Amen.

I mean this unironically.

→ More replies

49

u/Zolivia Go Give One Jan 07 '22

Amenunironically

→ More replies

195

u/CatchingRays Jan 07 '22

Slowest. Rapture. Ever.

60

u/Sheriff_monte Jan 07 '22

*Anything bad happens*

My aunt: "we're in the endgame now"

→ More replies

24

u/howlandwolf Worst. Rapture. EVER. Jan 07 '22

The worst.

→ More replies

155

u/SavaRox Jan 07 '22

George Carlin would be appalled to see his words used in a meme meant to support right-wing Christians.

49

u/GloomyBookkeeper6791 Beezlebub has a 😈 put aside for meee Jan 07 '22

The fact that they took such a brilliant man and have used his words so horrifically to support their terrible stand on this pandemic we are in is so tragic. Almost as tragic as the entire thing itself. I remember watching him in awe as a young kid late at night on HBO when the rest of the family was sleeping. Even at that young age he made so much sense to me. Seeing what they've done to his words has made me angry.

31

u/queen-adreena Jan 07 '22

They’ve done the exact same things with Jesus’ words.

They’re the exact type of “white-washed graves” that he would have whipped out of the temple.

13

u/GloomyBookkeeper6791 Beezlebub has a 😈 put aside for meee Jan 07 '22

I very much agree. I am not at all religious person. I'm more agnostic. But I do believe that if Jesus were here today, the brown skin immigrant that he is. They wouldn't be so kind to him.

From what I do know about Jesus, he wanted to help the poor and the disenfranchised. He wanted the community to come together for the greater good. He seems more socialist than anything.

→ More replies

23

u/Fabulous-Mud-9114 Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

What they love most about George Carlin (and MLK Jr., and the Founding Fathers, and any other 'authority' they quote) is that they're dead and can't correct the bullshit.

449

u/Responsible-Bug-7014 Jan 07 '22

I love how these people like to quote George Carlin without having the slightest idea about what he stood for.

241

u/Modifiedfinal Hidden Valley mRNAnch Jan 07 '22

They should look up his bits on abortion.

177

u/DaniCapsFan Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

Or religion. He has quite a monologue on the utter bullshit that is organized religion. "...but he LOVES you. He loves you, and he needs MONEY!"

42

u/wanna-be-wise Jan 07 '22

His delivery of "and he needs money" is by far the best delivery of any line by any comedian ever IMO.

→ More replies

26

u/JarOfDurt Jan 07 '22

My favourite was his "Catholic, which I was, until I reached the age of reason"

87

u/Responsible-Bug-7014 Jan 07 '22

I just imagine the horror when they find out. 🤣

→ More replies

8

u/wbgraphic Jan 07 '22

”Why is it that most of the people who are against abortion are people you wouldn't want to fuck in the first place?”

The rest of the rant.

70

u/TimeComprehensive450 Jan 07 '22

The Carlin quote is a perfect fit for the Republican party. They're just too dumb to see it.

→ More replies

684

u/Emotional_Beautiful8 Jan 07 '22

“Ergent Care”—Omg, was she any type of educated nurse? The spelling errors are really appalling.

187

u/NMB4Christmas Everybody's an ass kicker, until they get their ass kicked Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

Did you "here" the truth? It's truly scary how dumb and arrogant some of these nurses and other health care professionals are.

9

u/AfraidOfArguing Jan 07 '22

I like to imagine some people in that profession are like RPG characters who put all their points into medicine, and some didnt have that many points starting out

→ More replies

322

u/DaniCapsFan Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

"Bacteria's" when she should know that 1) "bacteria" is a plural noun and 2) PLURAL WORDS DO NOT TAKE APOSTROPHES.

201

u/BQDKNY Jan 07 '22 Helpful

If only it were a bacteria, we could have knocked this shit out with some antibiotics....a nurse who apparently doesn't know the difference between bacteria and viruses is no longer with us...can I get an AMEN?

70

u/oneplusetoipi Jan 07 '22

She was one of the people George Carlin said politicians are hoping for.

25

u/zerogravity111111 Jan 07 '22

How about an upvote instead.

→ More replies

29

u/A-man-of-mystery Covidious Albion Jan 07 '22

Also, her comment implied she thought all infectious diseases are bacterial. The one that killed her wasn't.

→ More replies
→ More replies

63

u/SaltyBarDog 5Goy Space Command Jan 07 '22

You don't remember that Foreigner song, Ergent?

→ More replies

38

u/Thanmandrathor Jan 07 '22

There are several types of nurses, and schooling seems to vary wildly, even regionally.

31

u/Properjob70 Jan 07 '22

It's an emurgency dept dammit!

31

u/Tara-Hymen Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

It is really horrifying how many fucking dumb people are nurses. They seem to be upping the standard, at least, by requiring a minimum of a bachelors degree to work in a hospital.

→ More replies

32

u/buggcup Jan 07 '22

Yeaaaah this made me fear for my life. She HAD to see the word “urgent” spelled correctly like a hundred times a day as a nurse. Holy hell.

77

u/Dopplerganager Jan 07 '22

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you don't have to actually be that intelligent to be a nurse. My husband and his sister are both nurses (RN). They have encountered some duuuuumb nurses in school and beyond.

→ More replies
→ More replies

123

u/Jindabyne1 Jan 07 '22 Silver

I hated the time when I lived in Ancient Rome and I only had one government run tv channel to watch.

29

u/Ragingredblue 🐎Praise the Lord and pass the Ivermectin!🐆 Jan 07 '22

And the lead pipes were damaging my brain.

24

u/Maxesse Jan 07 '22

Finally! Had to really scour the comments to find out somebody else pissed off at having only one channel to watch in Ancient Rome.

21

u/emptycagenowcorroded Jan 07 '22

Ancient Rome was Marxist was certainly a super hot take.

I mean she’s certainly right that there’s an argument to be made that the Garacci Brothers were proto-Socialists and as we know they had long tenures as elected officials — wait no as soon they began making reforms and improvements for the people the political leadership, wealthy and large landowners murdered them with their bare hands.

Somehow I get the sense some of these people would approve of how the Roman patricians handled the Garaccis, even though virtually all of these HCA winners would have been plebs. Maybe people never change?

→ More replies

92

u/SaltyBarDog 5Goy Space Command Jan 07 '22 Helpful

Read the history? Yeah, no way unfettered Capitalism in healthcare doesn't have an effect on who lives or dies. When you are playing a shitty hand, Qaren, don't push in all your chips.

36

u/kikiglitz Jan 07 '22

Not one single fucking person who posts this shit would be able to pick Karl Marx out of a fucking line up.

→ More replies
→ More replies

67

u/Immortal_in_well Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

"I don't see y'all buying a Bible and running to church...just sayin'."

How the fuck is that even remotely equivalent? Covid is a real problem, not a fake one. (Also of fucking COURSE I'm not going to church right now, there's a pandemic on.)

Also, if your god were truly loving, the "second coming" would not be a threat. No truly loving god would EVER send people to hell. No truly loving god would even CREATE a hell to send people to. The only god I would ever even consider worshipping would see the very idea as anathema.

You don't get to create free will and then not allow people to exercise it.

14

u/DaniCapsFan Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

Or maybe a truly loving god would not send people to hell for not believing in him but would send the ones who spent their lives harming others. I mean, sending serial killers and, say, child abusers to hell for their actions instead of their beliefs might be a bit of justice.

→ More replies

10

u/Miso-Hangry Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 08 '22

You’d love to see the mental gymnastics they do when they explain how free will and predestination theology work together.

Edited: to finish my actual sentence. Lol thanks to the 10 or so folks who got me anyway <3

→ More replies

211

u/secondarycontrol Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

Christian/Don't be a sheep/Christian/Don't be a sheep.

Huh.

105

u/diente_de_leon Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 08 '22

John 10:14 "I am the good shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own."

Not a Christian but I live with one. Those who belong to Jesus are known as sheep and those who do not are the goats. Just saying. And for the record, those who belong to Jesus aren't referred to as lions either! 🐆🐆🐆

Edit: changed "or known" to "are"

27

u/Plaitmaker Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

Which just shows Christian writers were urbanized. Sheep and goats are complementary not opposites in ancient herding cultures.

10

u/assaficionado42 Jan 07 '22

Country mouse and city mouse causing all of the worlds misunderstandings for thousands of years.

→ More replies

23

u/Fabulous-Mud-9114 Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

I once heard the rationalization that "we're sheep for GOD, not sheep for GOVERNMENT", which perfectly describes their sectarianism.

→ More replies

200

u/justrock54 Jan 07 '22

I'm so over religious nuts who call me, an atheist, a sheeple. They are the very definition of sheep. Your pastor (which means shepherd btw) , actually refers to you as a member of the flock.

59

u/queen-adreena Jan 07 '22

Ain’t you ever heard of a flock of lions!

33

u/kikiglitz Jan 07 '22

I've heard of a flock of seagulls.. similar?

→ More replies

180

u/Deathbeddit 🦆🦃🦢🦜🦆🦅🐓🦩 Jan 07 '22

If you want to burn sympathy more quickly, I think slide 10 has many of the strongest accelerants: Racism, Hitler-reference, transphobia, etc

47

u/SaltyBarDog 5Goy Space Command Jan 07 '22

A US leader would never heinous shit, right?

23

u/Fabulous-Mud-9114 Team Moderna Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

Guaranteed our awardee here would call that "communist propaganda to make us hate our own country".

Which is why the Texas State Board of Education once adopted a textbook that referred to slaves as "immigrant workers".

→ More replies
→ More replies

60

u/Mysterious_Planet Prey for the Lab🐀s Jan 07 '22

I wonder if they can put chronic stupidity as the cause of death on the certificate?

20

u/Spitzspot Jan 07 '22

These HCAs would be a target rich environment.👍

→ More replies

59

u/Spitzspot Jan 07 '22

I accept her decision to end her life of her own accord. My hope is her hate lies didn't take anyone else with her.

30

u/BarracudaBeautiful26 Team Mix & Match Jan 07 '22

The fact that she was a "nurse" makes me shudder.

58

u/ParadiseLosingIt Jan 07 '22

Can’t believe she was able to get through nursing school. Her grasp of grammar, spelling and capitalization rivals Trump’s.

9

u/Old_Gimlet_Eye Jan 07 '22

Not to mention the "science" of life beginning at conception.

→ More replies
→ More replies

252

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22 edited Feb 03 '22

[deleted]

74

u/vacuous_comment Omicron Persei 8 Jan 07 '22

Except that being kind to your nurses at the moment might also involve getting vaccinated and not clogging up the hospital system.

Maybe?

92

u/Deathbeddit 🦆🦃🦢🦜🦆🦅🐓🦩 Jan 07 '22

Options:

-shudder, agree

-laugh, agree

Depends on experience

81

u/AthleticNerd_ LET’S GO DARWIN! Jan 07 '22

I love jokes from healthcare providers suggesting they’ll intentionally give you improper care if they don’t like your politics.

It’s the hypocritical oath they swore.

→ More replies
→ More replies

40

u/Tattieaxp "Transvaccinated" ❌ Trans, vaccinated ✅ Jan 07 '22

I wonder if she treated her nurses kindly.

→ More replies

59

u/kittenpettingfool Jan 07 '22

I guess conservative nurses are vile enough to shove a catheter that's too big into any patient that seems too liberal.
Sadly that's believable.

63

u/busymomof4 Jan 07 '22

All nurses make catheter/IV size jokes. The truth is, we (normal nurses) will use the size that is the easiest to place, unless a procedure requires a certain size, because no one has time to make multiple attempts.

However I fully believe the awful nurses like the one shown here would make the time, just so they can hurt people they do not like.

→ More replies
→ More replies

34

u/Deathbeddit 🦆🦃🦢🦜🦆🦅🐓🦩 Jan 07 '22

One of those memes made it: Jesus or vaccines. Tailor made to hurt the believers.

11

u/DoomPaDeeDee Jan 07 '22

I'm trying to decide if that is good or bad.

→ More replies

32

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

→ More replies

33

u/Perenium_Falcon Jan 07 '22

Abrahamic death cults gonna Abrahamic death cult.

27

u/chinacat2002 Jan 07 '22

Wake up, America.

Betcha won't share with an open heart.

Like the OP wrote, she truly was living in the end times.

→ More replies

28

u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22

The George Carlin meme...

🤭

→ More replies

27

u/Phallangicide Jan 07 '22

The Psalms quote about God not sending plagues to his children.... pretty sure he did that in Egypt multiple times (if you believe the myths). Now, I thought we were all God's children. Make it make sense.

12

u/KnottShore Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22 Bless Up
  • Deuteronomy 2:34: utterly destroyed the men and the women and the little ones.

  • Deuteronomy 28:53: And thou shalt eat the fruit of thine own body, the flesh of thy sons and of thy daughters.

  • I Samuel 15:3: slay both man and woman, infant and suckling.

  • 2 Kings 8:12: dash their children, and rip up their women with child.

  • 2 Kings 15:16: all the women therein that were with child he ripped up.

  • Isaiah 13:16: Their children also shall be dashed to pieces before their eyes; their houses shall be spoiled and their wives ravished.

  • Isaiah 13:18: They shall have no pity on the fruit of the womb; their eyes shall not spare children.

  • Lamentations 2:20: Shall the women eat their fruit, and children.

  • Ezekiel 9:6: Slay utterly old and young, both maids and little children.

  • Hosea 9:14: give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts.

  • Hosea 13:16: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up.

  • Luke 23:29: For, behold, the days are coming, in which they shall say, Blessed are the barren, and the womb that never bare, and the paps which never gave suck.

→ More replies

26

u/Occupational_Hazards Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

Listen and here the truth. - I shudder at her intellect.

Chinese virus vaccine is toxic. - I can't tell if that is misleading or not, the Chinese developed their own vaccine which is more traditional and in line with what these MAGATS wrongfully assume the MRNA vaccine is. But I'm guessing they see Chinese Virus and assume it's shorthand for "the Rona."

→ More replies

23

u/Raccoon_Full_of_Cum Satan Gained a Fleshlight Jan 07 '22

"I'm living in the end times", say unbelievably arrogant narcissists who think that God organizes his cosmic plan around them, and them specifically.

→ More replies

22

u/Forward-Bank8412 Just for the Cookies 🍪 Jan 07 '22

A lot to unpack here, but I find it particularly funny that someone so hyper-neo-christian would feature atheist George Carlin in a post.

13

u/DaniCapsFan Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

The same George Carlin who had utter contempt for the so-called "pro-lifers," but I guess they ignore that.

19

u/SouthernRelease7015 Jan 07 '22

My least favorite part of Ancient Rome was how there was only one (Communist!) TV channel!

→ More replies

21

u/Dana_das_Grau Jan 07 '22

Isn’t it weird how these people talk about others living on fear and spreading fear, yet here she is sharing made up fear mongering bullshit about microchips, government control, disabled being disappeared, government creating a race war.

19

u/RedfishBluefish2222 Jan 07 '22

Slide 4:

"The government will take your will and rights away and give you SUBSTANDARD LIVING HOUSING, SUBSTANDARD FOOD, SUBSTANDARD MEDICAL CARE, WATER, 1 CHANNEL TV"

Soooo... why would your standard Trump-humper who lives in a trailer home, eating frozen pizza and cheetos, who stitches his own wounds, drinks from a hose and only watches 1 channel FOX anyway, even care about this? Isn't that their paradise anyway?

→ More replies

17

u/ManuelArdila Jan 07 '22

Antivaxxers' attacks against people who get the vaccine, follow social distancing measures, avoid social meetings and use masks contradicts a little bit all that "My Body, My Choice" they love to use.

10

u/brewercycle 🛸LrrrVid-19: Ruler of the Variant Omicron Persei 8🛸 Jan 07 '22

My Body Your Body, My Choice

FTFY

→ More replies

17

u/Last-Classroom1557 The Freedom Fridge Awaits Jan 07 '22

You may be extremely deranged when you share OAN articles. Tammi's nose job doesn't look like it's holding up to well.

13

u/VegasTesla1 😷Mask It or Casket, Karen!⚱️ Jan 07 '22

She is not standing for anything, anymore.

14

u/MacbookPrime Jan 07 '22

That Jesus post followed by the George Carlin meme is the biggest immediate whiplash I've seen on this sub.

14

u/Iuvenesco Jan 07 '22

Not even a prayer warrior post! Shocked…

40

u/chinacat2002 Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

Well, she won't have to listen to Bernie Sanders anymore.

/s

56

u/GloomyBookkeeper6791 Beezlebub has a 😈 put aside for meee Jan 07 '22

She doesn't even deserve to type out that man's name.

Her entire diatribe about not being like Germany and everywjere else was rather laughable. In some ways I wish we were like Germany. I wish we learned from our mistakes and grew from them. Instead of denying them and refusing to believe that they even exist.

→ More replies

16

u/psibear Team Mudblood 🩸 Jan 07 '22

Here! Here!

24

u/b0t1814 Jan 07 '22

Same! I just have it with these nut jobs just parroting faux news and OAN talking points. A lot of the European countries have socialized childcare, healthcare and higher Ed! They are happy AF!

15

u/GloomyBookkeeper6791 Beezlebub has a 😈 put aside for meee Jan 07 '22 edited Jan 07 '22

It's because they still look at those countries as they were back during their dark times in history. Kind of like how they want us to be great "again" you know, the good old days. Ask them when those days were and what was so great about them. It's pretty funny listening to the answers.

Those countries have moved on and became progressive in many ways. We're too busy fighting with all of the folks here that want us to go back to those years. Too busy to be able to get anywhere.

We are so fucked.

→ More replies
→ More replies

15

u/Sykoticflaw Team Pfizer Jan 07 '22

More and more, they prove just how much of a death cult it really is.

I only hope she didn't end up killing anyone else through her hateful recklessness.

13

u/TheMicMic Jan 07 '22

this lady Close all borders!

coronavirus Let's close your lungs instead

14

u/nykiek Jan 07 '22

NGL, "ergent care" would be brilliant if done on purpose.

8

u/Forward-Bank8412 Just for the Cookies 🍪 Jan 07 '22

Like a step between ER and urgent care!

→ More replies

34

u/DaniCapsFan Team Moderna Jan 07 '22

This woman was a mess. Yikes.

And hell doesn't exist, but COVID sure does!

→ More replies

10

u/Captainwelfare2 🇺🇦🌻Putin’s on the Fritz?🌻🇺🇦 Jan 07 '22

I don’t know, Covid seems pretty Ruthful for the vaccinated.

8

u/vsandrei 🐆 🐆 🐆🐆 🐆 🐆🐆 🐆🐆 🐆 🐆🐆 🐆 🐆🐆 Jan 07 '22

The unvaxxed are easier for the leopards to catch and feed upon.

The unvaxxed are also in great abundance.

🐆 🐆 🐆

→ More replies

10

u/BidenIsYourPOTUS Jan 07 '22

“Just keep your hands washed.”

Which will do nothing to stop a breathborne virus not transmitted by fomites, but,um, I guess you’ll have clean hands (?)

8

u/BQDKNY Jan 07 '22

A couple things.....first, I guess God decided not to protect her anymore...can I get an AMEN? Second, why is she worried about India creating bioweapons, Modi was the ramp ranger's boy....?

→ More replies

8

u/theswagdodo11 Jan 07 '22

Hell has free heating so it never gets cold even in winter. Sounds good to me

8

u/among_apes Jan 07 '22

“Usually Chanel 1” what a history buff