r/HermanCainAward • u/SurvivinginLA Ms. Moderna 2021 • Nov 29 '22
Antivax Golfer now in search of greener pastures. Awarded
I didn’t have room for the header, but yes, he really did post that top meme.
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u/yessri1953 Nov 29 '22
RIP, and May Your Example Lead Others to Make Science Based Decisions about Their Health
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u/Qildain Nov 30 '22
It won't. Stupid is as stupid does. Humans are doomed.
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u/RattusMcRatface I GET CLOSTERPHOBIA Nov 30 '22
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u/WarmishIce Nov 30 '22
God i hate these people so much. Lets say the vaccine somehow does cause death: the poor damn kid is gonna die anyways!
Also, the lawyer is an idiot. They ARE conspiracy theorists. They’re theorizing about a conspiracy, even if there theories have absolutely no fucking evidence
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u/PuckFigs Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
It won't. Stupid is as stupid does. Humans are doomed.
Take heart. There are more of us than there are of them. And they are right in the middle of a mass die off because virus, demographics, and Republicans.
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u/Tashiya Nov 29 '22
Man I love how all these assholes always end up “gone to heaven”. If they’re representative of the population of heaven, I have no interest in ever seeing that place, personally.
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u/Goose_o7 I am The TOOTH FAIRY! Nov 30 '22
Man I love how all these assholes always end up “gone to heaven”. If they’re representative of the population of heaven, I have no interest in ever seeing that place, personally.
They all honestly believe that they wind up in heaven, but fail to take into account the fact that they were all hate filled, miserable ASS HOLES their entire lives.
The end result is a trip down to "Satan's Sewer Treatment Plant" IN HELL! Where they will spend all of eternity in a settling tank along with all the other DEAD MAGA TURDS!
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u/tm_121 Nov 29 '22
Run by a god who is all powerful but does nothing to stop the eternal torture of billions of souls.
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u/PuckFigs Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
Run by a god who is all powerful but
does nothing to stop the eternal torture of billions of souls.did absolutely jack shit to stop the mass murder of 6 million of His Chosen People(TM).FTFY. And also, this brings us to the inevitable logical fork in the road: if gawd didn't stop the Holocaust despite being able to, then gawd is evil. If gawd wanted to stop the Holocaust but couldn't, then gawd is impotent. Either way, not worthy of 10% of my pre-tax and having to wake up early on Sunday morning.
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u/maxreddit Nov 30 '22
I always thought that the kinder reading of God was that he wasn't omnipotent. Like he made the universe, but he doesn't have much control of it. That particular reading at least allows for that "loving God" stuff but still allows for bad things to happen. He could really care about existence in that scenario, but he just doesn't have the power or understanding to make changes that would guarantee not to have horrible consequences. It at least makes God more understandable, anyway. The idea of starting a project that goes beyond your control is a relatable idea, and I think it makes God look better than "a being so monstrous that it would allow things like the holocaust to happen when he could stop it because of 'mysterious ways' or truly awe-inspiring pettiness over an apple getting eaten.'" Perhaps, that's covered by God being a thing beyond our comprehension, but that logic doesn't make me feel more positive toward the guy!
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u/NecroAssssin Nov 30 '22
The book of Revelations tells us that only 144k souls will be saved. Churches have done a lot of damage control to convince their tithes that that particular point isn't literal. But given the amount of selfish 'Christians' we see I can understand why that might be the only literal thing in the entire book.
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u/LALA-STL Nov 30 '22
I asked a Jehovah's Witness Watch Tower lady who came to my door about the 144k people allowed into heaven. She assured me that even tho space in heaven was limited, life down here on Earth would be dramatically improved for believers after the rapture. 🤷🏼♀️
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u/Glittering-Cellist34 Nov 29 '22
A few shots and he could be alive. Seems like an easy choice to me.
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u/BellyDancerEm Nov 29 '22
But he would much rather own the libs
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u/Glittering-Cellist34 Nov 29 '22
He stood for freedom. I stand for life.
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u/jaymansi Nov 29 '22
He stood. Now he is lying down on the job.
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u/MysteriousHat7343 Jaded Covid responder Nov 30 '22
He’s lying down on the job trying to own the libs; he needs to pull himself up by his bootstraps
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u/PorconeMassimo Nov 29 '22
Wonder how old he was. Didn’t see a redacted profile pic but am guessing fake Oakleys and a robust BMI
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u/SurvivinginLA Ms. Moderna 2021 Nov 29 '22
Mid-60s with a gut. Has lost a lot of friends recently, possibly to Covid, but I can’t say that definitely.
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u/ghostacrossthestreet Nov 29 '22
COVID keeps thinning the herd.
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u/NoComment002 Nov 30 '22
I don't get how they can watch their friends drop like flies and still deny that covid can be very deadly.
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u/GeneralTapioca Nov 29 '22
Do you remember what state he lived in? I like to keep track of the concentration of Bozo. Like an insurance adjuster.
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u/justlikeinmydreams My horse covets your paste 🐴 Nov 29 '22
In other news I made homemade chicken pot pie for lunch. It was awesome.
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u/Left_Coast_LeslieC Nov 30 '22
And I'll bet you could smell AND taste it, right?
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u/justlikeinmydreams My horse covets your paste 🐴 Nov 30 '22
My altered DNA has allowed me to taste and smell!
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u/redvariation Winner winner COVID dinner 🍽️ Nov 30 '22
I can taste and smell, I have 5G in my brain and can contact Bill Gates!!!
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u/TheOtherDutchGuy Nov 30 '22
I don’t find that I have the urge to contact Bill Gates that often, seems like a superfluous feature, but ofcourse I don’t know how many others might want to speak to him…
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u/TheOtherDutchGuy Nov 30 '22
That’s great news. And you’ll probably have some left over to enjoy today as well, right?
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u/justlikeinmydreams My horse covets your paste 🐴 Nov 30 '22
Yea and it is great being able to taste and smell
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u/Ned2Ken Nov 29 '22
You can apparently make anything a conservative punchline by saying "Stop doing X to flatten the curve". "If we just Obamacare for 2 weeks, we'll flatten the curve!" Ba-dump tsh!
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u/DilapidatedDickPlant Nov 29 '22
I want to drink cocaine, damn science questioners. Make coca cola great again!
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u/iambicman
🪦 Designated HCA Headstone Engraver 🪦
Nov 29 '22
•
epitaph
In case you think your future fun and livelihood depends
On whether what you post on social media offends,
Reflect on poor old Golfer Green, who never more shall rise
Because he failed to take offense at facebook's blatant lies.
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u/What-The-Helvetica Pfizer Pfanatic here! 😁 Nov 30 '22
That's beautiful, and well rhythmed too! 👏👏👏
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u/CF_FI_Fly Team Bivalent Booster Nov 29 '22
A "bacterial infection" caused his covid?
Why wouldn't physicians just give him antibiotics? Clearly that is the real thing being hidden in Area 51.
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u/C3POdreamer Nov 29 '22
Opportunistic secondary bactetial infection is the likely reason. Kurra, N., Woodard, P. I., Gandrakota, N., Gandhi, H., Polisetty, S. R., Ang, S. P., Patel, K. P., Chitimalla, V., Ali Baig, M. M., & Samudrala, G. (2022). Opportunistic Infections in COVID-19: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis. Cureus, 14(3), e23687. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.23687
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u/sojayn Take Some Prayercillin Nov 30 '22
Thanks for the article, and may your day be delightful for sharing it :)
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u/vctrmldrw Yeah, that's not how research works Nov 29 '22
Other way around. When your immune system is on its backside, bacteria have a field day. I'm going to take a guess that he was reluctant to admit that he was seriously ill and delayed seeking treatment for long enough to make the antibiotics futile.
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u/derelict_wanderer Twitter Antibodies 💉🐤 Nov 29 '22
At least he saved the antibiotics for those who need them.
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u/Lady_Grey_Smith Rebel Wheeze And Death Rattle Nov 30 '22
A noble sacrifice for the ones who actually follow science.
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u/ghostacrossthestreet Nov 29 '22
Given that we're three years into the pandemic, how highly transmissible Omicron is, and that these dimwits do nothing to avoid infection, it's highly unlikely this wasn't his first dance with COVID-19.
Even a "mild" case of COVID-19 can damage the immune system. If he has COVID before, then his body might have been waving an open invitation at any opportunistic infection -- viral, bacterial, or fungal.
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u/vctrmldrw Yeah, that's not how research works Nov 30 '22
Yes indeed. One thing is for sure though: his bacterial infection didn't cause COVID.
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u/Iio_xy Don't get the Merck of the beast 🩸 Nov 30 '22 edited Nov 30 '22
I'm sure they gave him antibiotics once he got admitted, but maybe it was too late then. Also keep in mind the side effects of antibiotics can be pretty harsh, compared to that the vaccine side effects are rarer and the common ones pretty mild. Add to that covid, all those other medications, probably being vented etc. and an additional bacterial infection is the last thing you would want.
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u/BZEBV No Liquid Chips! Nov 29 '22
One week later...Holy sh*t!
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u/Lady_Grey_Smith Rebel Wheeze And Death Rattle Nov 30 '22
He skipped Thanksgiving and saved turkey for everyone else.
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u/Estrald Nov 29 '22
I’m glad these posts are…dying down, ho hooooo!!!! Seriously though, either more science deniers are taking the vaccine, or the most idiotic of them died off, but I’m just glad it’s starting to cool off. I may think these people are dumb as rocks, but I don’t want them to die, especially because they’re gullible.
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u/LDSBS Prayer Warror Superstar 🌟 Nov 30 '22
According to Dr Osterholm most Covid deaths (88%) are people 65 or older.
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u/SpacePoddity Team Mix & Match Nov 30 '22
And we all know that the elderly are expendable because the Republicans told us so when they wanted to end shutdowns and mandates.
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u/MaddAdd69 Team Mix & Match Nov 29 '22
Aww. Poor thing killed itself.
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u/redvariation Winner winner COVID dinner 🍽️ Nov 30 '22
He fed his life to covid so that covid might replicate. So dedicated.
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u/Cultural-Answer-321 Deadpilled 💀 Nov 29 '22
I am so tempted to look up golfing jokes, but then I remember how bad they are.
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u/AtomicBombSquad Team Moderna Nov 29 '22
All my golf jokes are just Caddyshack references. So, uh, how 'bout a Fresca?
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u/MysteriousHat7343 Jaded Covid responder Nov 30 '22
You have to just hook the right one; otherwise they just land in a hazard
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u/RattusMcRatface I GET CLOSTERPHOBIA Nov 30 '22
He'd definitely have been feeling below par in the run-up to that award.
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u/7sins-wrath Nov 29 '22
Oh good; this golfer committing suicide leaves more tee times open for the rest of us ;)
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u/Querch Nov 30 '22
Wow, a climate science denier and a transphobe! Covid took down a really dirty hog here!
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u/LowMaintenance Thrice marked by the beast Nov 29 '22
Do these people not remember the dates of the shutdowns? I have responded to the one person I know who shared that meme with the dates of when "The Shutdown" occurred and they quickly changed the subject.
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u/boxinafox Nov 30 '22
“It wasn’t Covid, it was actually a bacterial infection that developed during Covid.”
Righhhht. Whatever helps you deny reality easier.
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Nov 30 '22
[deleted]
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u/coffeemonkeypants Nov 30 '22
Right. It's just like how no one actually dies from AIDS. They die from whatever secondary illness takes hold due to the repressed immune response - mostly pneumonia of some kind. There are a LOT of diseases where this is the case, but these people simply can't admit they've been duped.
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u/PuckFigs Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
No matter what, covid is the definite proximate cause. It's entirely possible that some other bug, viral or bacterial, hospital acquired or otherwise, was what finally did him in. By the time you get to that point, it's pretty much all over but the GFM.
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u/TheGoodOldCoder Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
Slide 14: "In your future! Imagine if you will... the year is 2024."
Not in their future. For them, 2024 never got out of the imagination phase.
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u/DadJokeBadJoke ZACABORG Nov 30 '22
And it sounds like a Tesla/Twitter dig at Elon Musk, their new beloved prophet, but EV = lib to them.
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u/igor001 Nov 30 '22
Americans have such an odd relationship with their elected officials.
'Vet them like they'll be in your house babysitting your kids!'
How about vet them like they'll be benign public servants, managing state bureaucracy and enacting fair public policy. You don't need to let them bathe your kids before they get your vote.
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u/Shady_Garden Go Give One Nov 30 '22
When they lowered him into the grave, did someone remember to remove the little flag from the hole?
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u/BroMan-Z Nov 30 '22
Let’s stop making stupid people famous…votes for trump and pushes to make Kyle famous.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Pay2466 Nov 30 '22
But the lock down was when TRUMP was President. There was no lock down while Biden was President.
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u/lousylakers Their new hoax is get the vaccine, I did Nov 30 '22
Don’t be comin’ up in ‘ere with your fax!
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u/Brokenspokes68 From Shitpost to Compost Nov 29 '22
I really find it difficult to believe that Gym Jordan owned anyone.
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u/DiamondplateDave 😷 Mask-Wearing Conformist 😷 Nov 30 '22
Owning? No, but perhaps renting them by the hour.
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u/davechri Nov 30 '22
Oh well. I’ve got better things to do than think about this guy. Like pulling weeds.
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u/PuckFigs Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
Oh well. I’ve got better things to do than think about this guy. Like
pulling weedsflossing my parrot's teeth or maybe just bathing my cats.
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u/WorstHatFreeSoup Nov 30 '22
Rod Serling would’ve had a field day with what’s going on in today’s world and this guy probably wouldn’t have understood that.
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u/SunOnTheInside Nov 30 '22
I was gonna say, Rod Serling’s Twilight Zone was really progressive, often addressing racism and other societal evils in a way that was far ahead of its time. I think that he’d be at odds with most of these jokers, for being narrow minded, hateful syncopates, with knee-jerk reactions to anything and everything they don’t understand.
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u/WorstHatFreeSoup Nov 30 '22
Couldn’t have said it better myself. A guy like this, would’ve attacked Serling for being a progressive.
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u/CheeseWhizzing Nov 30 '22
This man did not go to Heaven... I have dogs in Heaven and they would run his ass out in two shakes.
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u/MyUncleToby Nov 29 '22
Please, please confirm the professor at Johns Hopkins carried on with his own advice to FAFO.
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u/erection_specialist Nov 30 '22
Imagine if you will, the year is 2024...
Turns out he doesn't have to worry about it
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u/unicornbukkake Nov 30 '22
I hate it when these chucklefucks use Rod Serling's image. He was progressive and not just for the 1950s. He would still be progressive today, which might be the saddest sentence I've typed in a while. He fought tooth and nail to prevent his work from being sanitized; that's kind of the whole reason he produced the Twilight Zone.
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u/RealLADude Quantum Healer Nov 30 '22
In House, it was never lupus. For these people, it’s never Covid. It’s a bacterial infection that really did it.
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u/KonradWayne Nov 30 '22
"It's not Donald Trump they hate. It's us"
Can people only hate one thing at a time now?
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u/catperson3000 Nov 30 '22
Trump was in office during “lockdown,” like that’s who shut down your businesses, they’ve forgotten that already? Isn’t he still president to them?
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u/BurstEDO Nov 30 '22
You would have though that the right wing would have tripled efforts to stop/prevent this rampant misinformation spread at the time.
But it was politically convenient for them to both sit back and reap the political rewards and in some cases, promote and amplify it to gain favor from their base.
Now we have a completely impotent, failed "red wave" in the midterms and we have the macabre moment of realization that COVID death ratios among right wing voters actively cost some of these disinformation dipshits their elections by margins eerily related to COVID deaths in those races' districts.
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u/ManateeFlamingo Nov 30 '22
After 2+ years of this, it's amazing to me the difference between being vaccinated and not. Literally life and death. He didn't want to take the shot because of some shit he read online. Imagine!!
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u/FistofanAngryGoddess If I didn't want them shorn, I wouldn't have made them sheep Nov 30 '22
Oh wow, a fresh awardee! Dude kicked it over the long weekend.
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u/doll_parts87 Nov 30 '22
Yea he's so "wonderful" he spread misinformation and hate at others expense. If my parents acted this ignorant and selfish I would use it as an example of how important medical care is. But maybe because I've worked in a hospital in 2020...
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u/maxreddit Nov 30 '22
Number 13 was half correct. We do hate those traitorous, malicious, science-denying, hateful, bigot bio-terrorists, but we also hate the orange shitbag because he's the biggest one that enabled the rest of them.
Also, I was surprised for a second by how he brought up the deaths of Native Americans. Still, I quickly realized that he was just reaching for an incident that isn't actually relevant to America's mass shooting problems in an attempt to trivialize them. It's obvious that he gives absolutely no shit about the genocide of the natives.
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u/Suec08 He "probably" would be alive if he had taken the vaccine! Nov 30 '22
And the battle had nothing to do with taking guns! Taking lives, maybe, but not guns! /s
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u/Salvia_McLovin Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
I see a slight improvement in the universe somehow...I wonder what it was
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u/KrampyDoo Crossing the Vent Horizon Nov 30 '22
He liked people who are “White Supremest”.
We can conclude with a fair amount of confidence that a brain scan taken of this one before and after death would likely produce the same result.
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u/Shadowchaos Nov 30 '22
The charlie brown comic made my eyes roll back so hard they flew out of my skull
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u/peppermintesse Vax yo self FFS 💉 Nov 30 '22
Trying to pass that bullshit off as an actual Charlie Brown cartoon makes me want to throat punch someone.
This dude was dying as I was enjoying a third night of Thanksgiving dinner. No regrets on my choices.
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u/Few_Industry1314 Nov 30 '22
Hot damnit! Did he take the knowledge of "...what's really going on in Area 51." to the grave with him? Fock! I guess we will never know. :(
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u/DaniCapsFan Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
Maybe Peppermint Patty is a trans boy or NB and doesn't realize it yet. There's a reason Marcy calls them "sir."
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u/celtic_thistle Tickle Me ECMO Nov 30 '22
"It's not Trump 'they' hate, it's us!"
lol at this shit. No, we hate him and you for your actions, thanks. There's nothing sneaky about it. Nobody is attacking you or him. Those are consequences.
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u/SuburbanJunkie47 Nov 30 '22
My favorite is “know who you are voting for and vet them as if they were living in your house!” And I live in GA where over a million people voted for that idiot Herschel Walker.
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u/lousylakers Their new hoax is get the vaccine, I did Nov 30 '22
I know golf isn’t a concern for most here and it has nothing really to do with Covid but bear with my rant here. The LIV tour is a Saudi money washing invention that pays way too much for dumb team tournaments. They’re aligned with Drumpf to play on his courses because he’s been shunned by the PGA tour. The players that left for Saudi money are the biggest dicks and most self-entitled of the most famous players as well. These players have tried to going to court to allow them to play both tours and be ranked so they can play in the major tournaments (which is what most fans care about). So they took the money gave the finger and now want their cake too.
I’m a fan of golf and those that remain with PGA are to be commended because it’s a political schism in addition to money as the departed clearly have no problem with Drumpf and all that he has done (let alone the Saudi regime and their crimes).
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u/vakr001 Team Moderna Nov 30 '22
These people we’re describing what is happening in China right now. None of it came to fruition. They now pass it off as a scam. Idiots
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u/nyqs81 Team Pfizer Nov 30 '22
Funny on November 12th I went out to a bar and then a gentleman's club with some friends for my birthday. I was unmasked and yet am still here today.
Can't be get the recent bivalent vaccine to bring my count to four. It's a mystery.
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u/EtnaAtsume Nov 30 '22
Ah, wonderful. There's nothing wrong with the big compilations we've had lately but sometimes you just want a classic Herman Cain style post as a palate cleanser.
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u/talino2321 Nov 30 '22
Guess that last hole was a triple bogey... Wonder if we can play through while his body is laying in the fairway?
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u/DonRicardo1958 Nov 30 '22
That electric car post might be the dumbest thing I’ve ever read.
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u/kinggimped Nov 30 '22 edited Nov 30 '22
Pretty typical far right nonsense - get utterly outraged at a completely hypothetical situation that they just made up in their heads. The situation isn't real, but their manufactured outrage is. Like that whole litter box in school thing.
It's a lot like that migrant caravan of tens of thousands, which only arrives during election season to scaremonger their voters into demonising their opponents, and then mysteriously disappears until the next big vote.
They care more about imaginary problems like this than they do real ones, like constant school shootings or the proliferation of far right terrorist acts.
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u/cofclabman Nov 30 '22
And they aren’t even that imaginative. I mean, do they think the computers in gas cars couldn’t do the same thing?
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u/DadJokeBadJoke ZACABORG Nov 30 '22
I think it's a Elon Musk/Twitter/Tesla joke that they mistook for being about the libs.
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u/10MileHike Nov 30 '22
Maybe his doctor was Simone Gold.
I'm sure she "set him straight". /s
After all one of AFLDs ex doctors is now the surgeon general for Florida isn't he? Or some higher up admin. level appointment.
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u/JuiceKovacs Nov 29 '22
I mean, the first slide is kinda right though
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u/AtomicBombSquad Team Moderna Nov 29 '22
It reminds me of Tommy Lee Jones' line from Men in Black when asked by Will Smith why they don't just tell people about the aliens. He replied, paraphrasing, "A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky animals and you know it."
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u/redvariation Winner winner COVID dinner 🍽️ Nov 30 '22
Make sure it's not covid he died of, can't admit that, can we?
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u/JayHazel Nov 30 '22
I don't get it. How do Republicans say the shit they do without thinking for a second about how much the resemble what they're talking shit about?
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u/unbotoxable Vaccinated & oxygenated Nov 29 '22
But someone on Facebook told him he had "natural immunity?" How could this have happened? A mystery for the ages.