r/clevercomebacks • u/Teacher-Investor • 12d ago • Gold 1

Kansas City girl for the win Rule 1 | Posts must include a clever comeback

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33.1k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

445 comments sorted by

1.8k

u/DarthGayAgenda 12d ago

I don't see a problem, stadium food is expensive.

877

u/toomuch1265 12d ago

And a baked potato is a lot healthier than anything you can get at a stadium.

396

u/OPsuxdick 12d ago

It's definitely odd but I'm upset I never thought to do it lol it's perfect for winter in a stadium.

218

u/fnordfnordfnordfnord 12d ago

Keeps your hands warm too

97

u/ManateeeMan 12d ago

Boiled eggs are also great pocket warmer food.

96

u/Comekrelief 12d ago

I too like to keep soup in a bag during long football games

44

u/ManateeeMan 12d ago

I would be pretty scared of a leak

136

u/Stock_Exit 12d ago

Leek soup isn’t anything to be scared of…it’s quite delicious.

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u/ggodfrey 12d ago

That’s what the diapers are for

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u/gussiejo 12d ago

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

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u/SketchyLurker7 11d ago

I like to keep spaghetti in my pocket for emergencies.

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u/TheHighestHobo 12d ago

spaghetti is this best depending on their spaghetti policy

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u/weirdplacetogoonfire 12d ago

just convince Dee to carry it in her bag

14

u/claytorENT 12d ago

Oh um…I had something for this… Dee’s a BIRD!

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u/trans_pands 12d ago

Now all I can imagine is that one Vine of the guy tripping and then crying as he tries to stuff his spaghetti back into his pockets

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u/Cyrax89721 12d ago

How about some Tots® ?

6

u/frugal_masturbater 12d ago

Alright! Potatoes and Eggs. I'm liking this new getting-ready-for-a-game routine. Now where do I keep the vodka?

5

u/gigdy 12d ago

Stadium food is currently cheaper though.

4

u/packchen 12d ago

Nope. It’s actually not.

4

u/Paramisamigos 12d ago

Than a single baked potahto? Nah.

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u/ninja_kitten_ 11d ago

I had never thought of it before but you’re completely right! I think we may have stumbled upon the perfect stadium food for the football season.

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u/frugal_masturbater 12d ago

It's not even odd, I'm upset too. So we're two, that's even.

I will from now on seriously consider taking baked potatoes along. I mean shit.. wrapped in foil they stay hot for a damn long time. I'd probably coat the jacket in salt for extra flavor but that's about it.

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u/malfurionpre 11d ago

It's not that odd, the kid eating a watermelon rind included, now that's odd.

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u/egordoniv 12d ago

I wish you hadn't said that. I'm already thinking of hollowing-out one of those taters and filling it with bacon and melted cheese for the ultimate win.

8

u/packchen 12d ago

Splurt a little Santorum on there, and baby, you got a stew goin.

5

u/trans_pands 12d ago

I don’t want to be anywhere near something that Rick Santorum has splurted on

5

u/DarthGayAgenda 12d ago

They mean Santorum the anal discharge, not Santorum the sentient anal discharge.

5

u/Holiday_Memory_9165 12d ago

Bacon & cheese huh? Yeah... Ok.

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u/canihavemymoneyback 11d ago

I like the way you think. A baked potato is only as good as what you put on it. A plain potato is generally tasteless. At the very least you need to sprinkle some salt. At best, it’s that bacon, melted cheese combo you’re suggesting. YUM !

2

u/EffortlessEffluvium 11d ago

It tastes like a potato.

I also like unsalted chips.

32

u/DMmeDuckPics 12d ago

And it's an eco friendly hand warmer.

3

u/GooseyGhost 12d ago

A little bland though, unless you use a syringe to inject butter and salt.

4

u/ninja_kitten_ 11d ago

I’m sure you could smuggle in toppings of your choice. I’m personally a salt, sour cream, and chives on my potato type of girl

5

u/Expensive-Question-3 12d ago

Not to mention an excellent hand-warmer

2

u/ShankThatSnitch 12d ago

And it is a hand warmer until you eat it!

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u/MiserableEmu4 12d ago

Potatoes are also good.

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u/YosemiteMyHeart 12d ago

It’s also an ideal hand warmer

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u/jakeblew2 12d ago

Not just that but I'm not even a picky eater and it all looks like slop. I'll overpay if it's good

I did have a lovely 2 ingredient mac n cheese courtesy the MN United soccer app. Lol they seriously send food to you in their stadium pub with the team's app. And it was only like $6!

7

u/LivJong 12d ago

I brought a pocket potato with me before. I got the idea from one of Laura Ingalls Wilder last books.

She and her new young family went to visit her parents for Christmas and when they headed home her mom Caroline put piping hot baked potatoes in their pockets like handwarmers and when they cooled they were eaten.

2

u/Additional-Pin-6529 11d ago

I remember that book!

12

u/PsyopVet 12d ago

Seriously, I live in Jacksonville and have paid a ton of money at Jags games for some crappy food. Pocket potatoes are genius!

11

u/BigBoy1229 12d ago

There’s also pocket dogs:

https://youtu.be/2figKn2aBFU

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u/PsyopVet 12d ago

I want pocket dogs! I feel stupid for not thinking about this before now. I’m cheap as hell, and I sneak food into theaters all of the time, why didn’t I think of doing it at games?

3

u/Conchobair 12d ago

I make them in my toilet kitchen

3

u/Throwaway021614 12d ago

Probably getting banned for sneaking outside food and circumventing the over priced crap at stadiums

3

u/United-Cockroach-980 12d ago

$25 beers at Rams games..

3

u/Jts20 12d ago

Is that the actual price at So-Fi??? Wow

3

u/randonumero 12d ago

My only problem is it looks like she's eating it dry. If you're going to sneak in food might as well bring butter and sour cream

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u/ninja_kitten_ 11d ago

A baked potato would also stay warm for so long!

(I have to admit that I haven’t been to a football game since college and my college was in San Diego so a starch based hand warmer wouldn’t have really been a necessity lmao)

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u/SubconsciousBraider 12d ago

I'd totally eat a pocket baked potato.

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u/ServelanDarrow 12d ago

Wish I had one rn.

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u/bigdefmute 12d ago

Just reached in my pocket, all disappointment

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u/Pxtbw 12d ago

As i was leaving this thread i saw your comment.😂. I had to comeback to upvote🤣

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u/gussiejo 12d ago

Why I Reddit 🤗

6

u/Pxtbw 12d ago

Samies♥️🥰🙌🏻🤗. Yay!! Have a fantastic one

3

u/WartimeDad 12d ago

What makes this so funny is the actually wanting to eat a baked potato part.

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u/MysteryCheese89 12d ago

That's it, next game I go to I'm loading my pockets up with twice baked (loaded) potatoes.

Potatoes for all who will eat them!

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u/jakeblew2 12d ago

Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a shoe

3

u/SubconsciousBraider 12d ago

Yes. All the ways!

7

u/Lord_of_Millenheim 12d ago

Is that a potato in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see the doctor so he can treat your swollen testicles?

2

u/SubconsciousBraider 12d ago

Well, I don't have testicles so that would be a huge surprise.

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u/Elbandito78 12d ago

This is honestly brilliant. First it's a handwarmer. Then, once you've had a few beers, it's the sustenance to power you through the rest of the game.

243

u/Second-Ancient 12d ago

Amazingly brilliant. Slice em open n slab some butter in it then stuff it in a sandwich ziplock. Doing this next season.

136

u/HallucinatesPenguins 12d ago

Wrap in foil to preserve heat

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u/piclemaniscool 12d ago

Never settle for less. That kind of wrap is just the best, to keep your tater nice and fresh.

25

u/ForfeitFPV 12d ago

With aluminum foil

foooooiiiiil

15

u/analogkid01 12d ago

Oh by the way, I've cracked the cooooooode...

4

u/Beltalowda-Sa 12d ago

Jeff Bezos nervously licks his own eye like a gecko

13

u/Second-Ancient 12d ago

Foil would get confiscated by security!

10

u/no_objections_here 12d ago

Then they'd probably take the potato too

9

u/lurkermadeanaccount 12d ago

There’s always the prison wallet.

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u/MotaHead 12d ago

If you put a raw potato up there the night before, your body heat will work just like a slow cooker. By game time it will be perfectly tender.

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u/lurkermadeanaccount 12d ago

I’m not going to the game but I might try a sweet potato for game day anyway.

5

u/9emiller77 12d ago

Prison wallet potato sounds like a recipe you would click on but I imagine if you did you would go straight to eye bleach.

6

u/lurkermadeanaccount 12d ago

I’m thinking baby potatoes beads in a condom. Worst case scenario they’re mashed.

4

u/9emiller77 12d ago

LOL! I would prefer not to think about an assload of potatoes in a condom, Friend

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u/frugal_masturbater 12d ago

Oh JFC there's not even a game I'm going to but now I have to try.

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u/eloquentpetrichor 12d ago

Bring it in the plastic bag and have some foil folded up so security can see it is no threat then wrap it up after you get in. I've wrapped my lunch in space blankets as makeshift lunch boxes before when taking salad to work at my job in a stadium. They were sus of the space blanket on the scanner but a few questions and I passed right through. If they had needed to search me it still would have been fine, just a hassle to rewrap

6

u/thirtywalrusbass 12d ago

Better to use something like a wash cloth that it a thermal insulator instead of a heat conductor like aluminum.

It's why fresh tortillas are wrapped in towels to keep them warm

EDIT. It occurs to me that if it's in the pocket of a winter coat, the coat will keep it warm too.

16

u/RIPDSJustinRipley 12d ago

Stick 'em in a stew.

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u/Slappathebassmon 12d ago

Even you couldn't say no to that.

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u/TheShanManPhx 12d ago

Oh yes I could!

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u/famous_shaymus 12d ago

Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew!

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u/Pavlo_escargotte 12d ago

And THE SALT!!!

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u/Diremustang94 12d ago

Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew

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u/9emiller77 12d ago

Also a fine projectile should one be needed

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u/GrapeScotch 12d ago

And a biodegradable one!

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u/9emiller77 12d ago

Great call! Being environmentally responsible is the way to go when attempting to injure officiating staff!

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u/GrapeScotch 12d ago

Or rival fans taking your picture while you’re just trying to enjoy a game and a pocket potato, then publicly shaming you with it. Rival picture taker is definitely within potato launch range.

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u/9emiller77 12d ago

Another good call. I think you get bonus points if you grind it in instead of throw it.

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u/peepopowitz67 12d ago

And heeeere come the pretzels

3

u/the_fickle_pickle 12d ago

I already brought mustard, tho

2

u/9emiller77 12d ago

Mustard does not need a potato to be great. It can be enjoyed on its own from the bottle or the easier to hide packet version.

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u/Tombaugh_Regio 12d ago

Eagles fans have entered the chat

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u/Johnny_Poppyseed 12d ago

And coincidentally for anyone from Philadelphia, can also be used as a battery.

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u/9emiller77 12d ago

It’s the Swiss Army knife of tubers

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u/jamesno26 12d ago

This is Kansas City, not Philadelphia.

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u/Icy_Calligrapher_256 12d ago

I just hope is had butter sour cream salt and pepper and a sprinkle of chives, but I’m pretty sure this woman brought the seasoning.

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u/YosemiteMyHeart 12d ago

I should have read down farther before commenting! Thought the same thing

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u/nottke 12d ago

This confused me until I noticed her KC logo was flipped.

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u/spacecatbiscuits 12d ago

still seems confusing

they both look higher up in the stand

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u/nottke 12d ago

It's the way the photo was taken and the first appears to be a wider angle lens.

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u/gcm6664 12d ago

Thank you!. I was about to post "am I the only one who..."

Saved me.

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u/RooMyLife 12d ago

Jacket potatoes for the win

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u/Elbandito78 12d ago

I myself prefer a pocket dog but might have to give jacket potatoes a try.

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u/gtg930r 12d ago

Or, and hear me out, por que no los dos?

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u/scottymtp 12d ago

Will pair well with my wife's purse shrimp.

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u/Dibutops 12d ago

Wait I'm getting the sense some people don't call them jacket potatoes

edit: It's a UK thing?

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u/RooMyLife 12d ago

I didn't know that either. It was a perfectly good pun wasted. I'll stick to the UK subs

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u/OGPunkr 12d ago

nah, this american got it. I think people are just going for the word play mostly.

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u/RooMyLife 12d ago

And her meat sleeve, trouser taco, knicker clam...

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u/Prysorra2 12d ago

Jacket potatoes

"English Jacket" is literally a way to make 'em. lol

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u/Jos3ph 12d ago

They upvoting but do they get it?

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u/MisterBigDude 12d ago

Boil ‘em, mash ‘em, stick ‘em in your pocket.

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u/PicklesnNickels 12d ago

I would absolutely eat a baked potato out of my pocket, it would keep me warm and it’s a snack.

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u/fatherdale 12d ago

Wife material

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u/whymygraine 12d ago

For real. This lady knows tricks that will make life easier.

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u/HarveyThaWabbit 12d ago

Seriously, this is the kind of shit I look for, then I shoot my shot and she is always taken. They don't stay on the market long boys.

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u/jjcoola 12d ago

We need a support group, each time it hurts more

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u/Ab47203 11d ago

Just do what I did and realize you like men more

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u/jakeblew2 12d ago

As long as she doesn't put too much starch in our shirts

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u/SophiaofPrussia 12d ago

Just in the pockets it seems.

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u/smitty3z 12d ago

Almost as good a pocket tator tots.

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u/willbeach8890 12d ago

GET YOUR OWN!!

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u/smitty3z 12d ago

Gosh.

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u/MyAnonReddit7 12d ago

I haven't freaking eaten ANYTHING today.

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u/uberblack 12d ago

Or a delicious bass

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u/Chummers5 12d ago

Sneak a beer in and everyone's cheering you for not spending $15 on a tall boy.

Sneak a potato in and people give you weird looks.

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u/OMP159 12d ago

I'm in love with a tater girl, She said see you later girl,

Can i make it more obvious.

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u/sl_hawaii 12d ago

+1 for the creative music reference!!

-1 because I love KC tater girl too and you and I are now eternal, mortal enemies and I must dedicate my life to destroying you. Sorry. I suspect we could’ve been friends were it not for KC tater love.

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u/SunriseSurprise 12d ago

I've got a girlfriend, she eats potato.

I've got a potato girl yea!

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u/dog_eat_god 12d ago

KC Girl 1, Donkey Doug 0.

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u/clubberin 12d ago

BORTLES!

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u/itsfuckingpizzatime 12d ago

I used to eat pocket potatoes every day. Take 15-20 small potatoes, toss em in olive oil, garlic, S&P, and bake for an hour or until they’re brown and crispy. Wrap each in foil. Every day, just throw one or two in your backpack and off you go. Honestly the best tasting, most filling, cheapest snack you can get.

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u/newheartwithin 12d ago

Username does not check out

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u/Away-Regular1335 12d ago

She's gonna start s trend amongst frigid weather teams.

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u/RagingAnemone 12d ago

Its already common in Japan except they're usually sweet potatoes

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u/TragicallySalacious 12d ago

That clapback was a KC masterpiece

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u/thatwolfieguy 12d ago

KC Masterpiece is terrible. Try to get some Jack Stack sauce.

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u/PhotoQuig 12d ago

Did you comment the exact same thing on both posts?

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u/lickmydicknipple 12d ago

You could go check

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u/FiIthy_Anarchist 12d ago

Respect the hustle

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u/1961tracy 12d ago

She played that well. Maybe that’ll teach him to mind his own business.

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u/malcontent254 12d ago

That would be a great food to sneak into a stadium…..genius!

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u/yellowspiderandleaf 12d ago

Need Some cream for that burn and some sour cream for that tater!

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u/DeafLoser67 12d ago

Delicious. Who wouldn’t want a pocket potato?? I mean It’s better then expensive stadium food.

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u/Due_Kaleidoscope7066 12d ago

I genuinely would not want a pocket potato. I find baked potatoes to be dry and I would need some toppings. I’m not gonna throw in pocket cheese and pocket bacon and pocket chives.

But I seem to be one of very few.

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u/MKclinch8 11d ago

These people would all be like why the fuck am I eating a dry, baked potato out of my pocket, once the quirkiness of the tweet wears off.

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u/queasy_self_controL 12d ago

Baked potato serves two purposes warm your hands and it's tasty

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u/Robthebold 12d ago

Better than a hand warmer

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u/ptapobane 12d ago

Pocket potato! great as a snack, effective as a projectile! Pocket potato!

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u/yellowspiderandleaf 12d ago

Shi Shi shaaaa!

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u/Officer412-L 12d ago

Can I offer you a nice baked potato in this trying time?

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u/christopherDdouglas 12d ago

I learned that baked potato's keep you warm from reading Little House in the Big Woods as a child.

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u/MamboCircus 12d ago

"You may have snapped my pic, but I outsnapped your snapping"

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u/Lucifer666158 12d ago

Potato girl still alive, AoT lied to me

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u/beelzybubby 12d ago

Listen here.

The wound is still fresh and I've had a bad day and can we not? :'(

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u/quinteroreyes 12d ago

Damn. I've only seen that part of her offering her potato and now I find out she is gone. Welp there goes my joy

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u/TJ_McWeaksauce 12d ago

I've considered eating tater tots out of my cargo pants pockets like Napoleon Dynamite, so I'd be totally fine with eating a baked potato from my pocket.

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u/JenVixen420 12d ago

This has celiac vibes written all over it. We take food everywhere.

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u/DescendingOpinion 12d ago

Never rag on what sustained Matt Damon for over a year on Mars.

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u/select_L0L 12d ago

Now this is the midwestern ingenuity we need

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u/BenevolentBlackbird 12d ago

Good for her. I’m fucking sick and tired of the amount of photographing strangers just to make fun of them on the internet.

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u/IAMTHATGUY03 12d ago

That’s like 1/3 I’d Reddit content tho….

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u/beaverlakenc 12d ago

Wait, who eats a plain baked potato? Is this a thing?

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u/0mensia 12d ago

Throw some salt on and microwave it, wrap it in tinfoil and you now have a snacc

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u/Intrepid_Agency9269 12d ago

It’s a potato

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u/beesarewild 12d ago

What's potato precious?

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u/xRee4x 12d ago

Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew

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u/Snufflebear420_69 12d ago

PO-TA-T-- oh wait..

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u/hendrix320 12d ago

Reminds me of road potatoes I use to eat on the way to work. At least I wrapped them in tin foil though

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u/mod_target_6769 12d ago

I hope he likes salt

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u/usernamesarehard1979 12d ago

So...just the potato then sir?

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u/wreckmx 12d ago

Going to need all the comfort food you can get this Sunday. Who Dey!

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u/spaceehardware 12d ago

Bugs Bunny move right here. I’m in awe.

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

God, I love my hometown and team

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u/DobsonusPrime1 12d ago

She seems to have lost her beard

Edit: my bad that was her hair

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u/cagingthing 12d ago

She wins

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u/AtoSaibot 12d ago

Po Tay To

Legend

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u/LoganSterling 12d ago

I will marry any woman that carries cooked potatoes in her pockets.....

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u/Kris_n 12d ago

Why is it weird to eat a baked potato?

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u/MvatolokoS 12d ago

As someone who grew up in KC, I am proud.

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u/MichaelScarn1968 12d ago

KC Potato Girl…Is your name Sasha Buraus?

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u/Kokichi-_- 12d ago

POLAND REFERENCE!!! IN POLAND "KC" IS SHORT FOR "KOCHAM CIĘ", WHICH MEANS "I LOVE YOU" 😲😲😲

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u/sl_hawaii 12d ago

God I love the random shit I learn on Reddit!!

Thank you, wise polish knowing person!

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u/Kokichi-_- 12d ago

no problem random redditor!

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u/No_Repeat_9482 12d ago

I would marry this woman. Sports fan and has a pocket potato. Where do I sign up.

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u/just-a-visitor-here 12d ago

She doesn't look like she was enjoying it

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u/bunglejerry 12d ago

Maybe she didn't enjoy having a stranger take pictures of her.

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