r/dating_advice • u/ducksthefucks • 20d ago

Dear men maybe instead of expecting women to lower their standards, you should better yourselves

This is geared towards men because men are the majority culprits of this. You can see the comments section of posts of any dating subreddit. Better yourself for yourself not for women. Better yourself spiritually, mentally, emotionally. Learn, grow, ho.

Edit 1: Thanks so so so much for the awards and likes. Love you all may the universe bless you with all its love ❤

Edit 2: Three boys have taken it upon themselves to harass me one the username prism-something and the other scary-crow-something, and youranaway something in my DMs calling me entitled and that they wouldn't marry me (not asking you to) or shtting on my published books. Please refrain from sending me harassing messages because the comments are locked. I didn't lock the comments.

Edit 3: Also 6 boys have taken it upon themselves to DM directly critiquing my post. You're critiques are already in the comments below. Yes I know "women do it to". You don't agree with me, that is fine. Downvote this post and walk away. I posted an observation just like any other poster on this subreddit please do not DM me directly because the comments are locked. This is harassment (especially numerous boys who DMed after my 3rd edit)

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u/CreepingBeauty99 20d ago

Average looking men don't even get the chance to nitpick. If they're lucky, they'll get 20 matches a year, maybe five of those will lead to a first date, maybe two a second. Only at that point do their honest preferences in a partner come into play

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u/jjjjll3754 20d ago edited 20d ago

they nitpick women to put them down when the women didnt want them anyways. men who get rejected loved to insult your appearance

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u/CreepingBeauty99 20d ago

Those men are shit. Not everyone has an external locus of control. Men who have an internal locus of control will naturally blame themselves and have most likely spent a lifetime trying to improve themselves.

I have an internal locus of control and despite my bitterness towards life and chance, I always seek to leave the people I date better off than they were before they met me

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u/jjjjll3754 20d ago

i think men just value women being attracted to them so much they think its the ultimate insult to us they dont find us attractive as if we think the same as them

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u/CreepingBeauty99 20d ago

Toxic people will be toxic. Insulting people because they rejected you is just toxic behavior. It's not normal. I've been rejected more times than I can even remember. I've never once insulted someone as a result. And that shit hits me hard, but the person rejecting me will never even know it. That's my problem to deal with, not theirs.

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u/jjjjll3754 20d ago

i never said it was all men

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u/CreepingBeauty99 20d ago

Neither did I. We were only ever talking about the group of men you brought up who insult people when they're rejected. Those men aren't even worth considering. I hope you're able to just forget whatever awful insults they threw at you because you should never be punished for choosing not to pursue a relationship with someone.

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u/sharkbaitbroohaha 20d ago

That's cuz you're not all that