r/facepalm • u/DarthPirate10i • 16d ago
This isn't even satire removed- obvious joke
https://i.redd.it/4ov2jel502h71.jpg
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u/jibsymalone 16d ago
They sorta had me in the beginning, not going to lie... People always find a way to astound me it would seem
(I am not anti-vax at all, just in case it came across that way in the slightest)
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u/BarbershopSaul 16d ago
<insert they had us in the first half meme>
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u/sharkmmg 15d ago
<remove they had us in tbe first halm meme> <insert maniacal laugh> im so evil
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u/TheMaster199 15d ago
<insert shut the fuck up>
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u/SnorkaSound 15d ago
what
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u/sharkmmg 15d ago
Yes
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u/CheSwain 15d ago
Maybe
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u/TheDrunkKanyeWest 16d ago
That's so sad. I was gonna use that little girl to boost my 5G signal. :(
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u/AusCan531 16d ago
I am STILL going to use her to stick papers to my fridge.
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u/VergeOfHomeless 15d ago
Im buying pots that accept induction so i need her at ikea this time around 5
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u/SixxTheSandman 15d ago edited 15d ago
Jesus Christ, don't you dumb motherfuckers know how anything works? The vaccine messes with the 5G signal, causing Google Maps to plot a course for direct impact into a newly vaccinated person! It's even worse if you drive a Tesla.. If you use her to boost your 5G, you'll just crash over and over again as your cars CPU shorts out DO YOUR RESEARCH!!!
Eeek, gods, looking at the above I can see people actually believing it. WTF happened to our country?
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u/Drunkentraitor 15d ago
not just your country.
it seems stupidity is more catching than covid, and it can be transmitted over wifi.
maybe there is something to the 5g thing. it will allow lunacy to spread much faster...
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u/Bas3dMonk3 15d ago
All these people getting the covid shot don’t know they’re becoming walking 5G towers
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u/OurOnlyWayForward 16d ago
Lmao I think that’s just a well executed joke
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u/Dragoninja26 15d ago
I also think that's the case in this one, especially since some of the people are saying this is a well-known repost and troll, but there are definitely people who are capable of saying this completely seriously while believing every word they say to be true, not just acting
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u/private_unlimited 16d ago
The vaccines….made a child….magnetic
I’m at a loss for words. If I could become magneto by taking vaccines, I would right now be magneto
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u/RoutSpout 15d ago
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u/sn0wf1ake1 15d ago
I just slapped my forehead with a spoon about 50 times and it didn't stick. I call shenanigans.
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u/Drunkentraitor 15d ago
try a metal spoon.
wooden ones wont work. the technology is too old to be 5g compatible.
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u/BlueberryNo3773 16d ago
I have lost all hope for humanity. If she was actually magnetized the bike would of have stuck to her first before the car and you need to be 12 years minimum to get the vax
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u/notatechnicianyo 16d ago
The post says she got the MMR vaccine. Recommended before two years typically. This post is literally over 4 years old.
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u/real_dubblebrick 16d ago
She said MMR, not COVID
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u/BlueberryNo3773 16d ago
Sorry. Stupidity on my part.
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u/notatechnicianyo 16d ago
I wouldn’t say stupid, our mind auto fills and autocompletes stuff naturally. With all the covid posts that seem to be 95% of r/facepalm lately it’s a reasonable oversight.
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u/buildingforants 16d ago
It's a troll bro. A lot goes over your head doesn't it?
Oh by the way, "going over one's head" is a saying, I don't literally mean things go over your head.
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u/Charles722 15d ago
Idk why you have so many downvotes. This is a classic troll post lol
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u/buildingforants 15d ago
Reddit is like one step above Twitter. I don't put too much value in either upvotes or downvotes. Shit shifts with the wind.
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u/ChaimCad 16d ago
Some people just should be shot
In the foot, doesn't even need to kill them. Just make them feel a lot of pain. Using the death of a kid to spread more misinformation and kill more kids, what a nice human being
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u/Sensitive_Suspect_69 16d ago
Me: reads the post and comments
My mind: Ah, so it's from that country. Understandable.
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u/kiddsky 16d ago
Ah yet another indictment of the American education system.
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u/Blueditt_9 16d ago
How you know these people are from America? Stop assuming that every stupid person is from America. I'm sick of it.
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u/tomorrow509 16d ago
How do we know they're from America? Because they're refusing the vaccine. People in the rest of the world are lining up for it, if it's available.
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u/hovopotter 16d ago
This is a very old post. They're most definitely not talking about the COVID vaccine.
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u/tomorrow509 16d ago
That may be, but as we say, those that don't learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.
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u/cristhecat 15d ago
Sorry to break it to you and i wish it was only america but anti vaxxers are everywhere, sadly stupidity is anywhere a person could live. 😕
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u/kleterkie 16d ago
'anyone ever experienced something like this?' wtf hahaha yeah plannets crash into me daily.
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u/Environmental-Owl623 16d ago
A vaccine made her a magnetic no no no no Jesus Christ lol ahahahaha
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u/Merry_Sue 16d ago
You're saying that Jesus made her magnetic?
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u/Environmental-Owl623 16d ago
Huh it’s a figure of speech when some says something stupid like the vaccine made you magnetic you would say oh Jesus Christ your not serious
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u/HappyMeatbag 15d ago
Maybe there’s something wrong with me, but in my mind, the tragedy of this event is offset by the absurdity of imagining a magnetized four year old.
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u/terminat323 15d ago
This is so blatantly idiotic it hurts. Perfect example to be in this sub. This woman (I'm assuming) clearly was being deceptive in her post, and only after explaining in the comments can we see how fucking stupid she is.
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u/Ron_V 16d ago
Sometimes there are people so stupid, you begin to wonder if we'd be better of in a non-democratic society.
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u/[deleted] 16d ago
[deleted]
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u/notatechnicianyo 16d ago
I think when they said non-democratic they meant not allowing the ignorant masses to participate in a democratic process. Rather than referring to the Democratic Party. I could be mistaken.
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u/Dragoninja26 15d ago
Non-democratic regimes can definitely be better and a lot more efficient with the right leader, but they can also become really bad very quickly with the wrong one, it's not easy to find a good enough person + keep the power from going to their head + all the other issues, basically as with everything: it has it's own strengths and weaknesses, pros and cons, etc
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u/Feeling_Advice_2309 16d ago
Can confirm, I had the vaccine last week and I'm still stuck on the side of my van.
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u/No_Garbage_7085 16d ago
You will experienced it when you will be placed inside an MRI machine for your full body and mental check up
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u/Raqdoll_ 16d ago
Ah yes, it's sad to see so many magnetized children flying towards cars, trains, bigger magnets etc. Such a tragic way to go
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u/NirvanaPenguin 16d ago
At this point just say aliens killed her too jajaja damn... now the covid vaccine turn you into Magneto jajaja omg that was a good laugh.
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u/djluminol 16d ago
Scuse me while I kiss the Skylark.
And just like that little Suzy and the neighbors Buick went off to the junkyard in the sky.
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u/DankCommander7 16d ago
I think these people watch too many movies and then think thats how the world works.
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u/Mortgage_Specific 15d ago
Remember, harsh times create harsh men, harsh men create easy times, easy times create easy men, easy men create harsh times
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u/Sokandueler95 15d ago
Girl gets vaccinated. Day later, she gets hit by a car. Coincidence? Yes…yes, it’s absolutely a coincidence.
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u/lonely_funny_guy 15d ago
They should put a magnet on their head so that the iron in their blood will make sure that blood reaches their brain.
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u/AdvocateDoogy 15d ago
Why do these people continue to let their own stupidity run rampant and grow potent?
Where's that person in their life who smacks them across the face and says "Hey! You're an idiot."
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u/RookieFictioner 15d ago
Wait... I'm confused. Did Green trick them to believe that the daughter died from a vaccine... when in reality, it was the hit of a car?
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u/RedsDeadWhosZed 15d ago
It’s like saying “Back in Nam…” and then only clarifying later, that you weren’t part of any war, but instead visited Vietnam for business reasons.
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u/TheGenderedChild 15d ago
What pisses me off the most is that outside of electromagnets, heavy metals aren't even magnetic. Its only iron nickel and cobalt.
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u/DevCatOTA 15d ago
I want the driver of the car to bring this to court and make the claim that his car was attracted to the child according to her mother.
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u/EdibleLiquid_ 15d ago
At least the poor girl got killed quickly so she didn't have to deal with these ᴛʜɪɴɢs
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u/jetblackpope17 15d ago
Fairly new to r/facepalm, but the was the first time it actually made me palm my face.
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u/SirArthurDime 15d ago edited 15d ago
If you could move something the size of a car you have become magneto and i have no idea why anyone would NOT want this
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u/Miserable_Command_29 15d ago
God I can't tell if she's being sarcastic or shes actually a dumbfuck.
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u/dominarhexx 15d ago
Talked to a family member the other night and she was saying how her younger sister and mom were staunchly anti-vaxx. Her mom has really bad rheumatoid arthritis a few years back and it's afraid of it and the sister just buys into the bs. Said they have a family member in Europe who got the vaccine and then died of a clot a few weeks later. I asked my mom to verify this and she told me the person that died was her 90 something year old aunt who had multiple strokes one the past decade. Some people will literally reach for anything.
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u/AltitudinousOne 15d ago
Hi, /u/DarthPirate10i Thank you for participating in r/facepalm. Unfortunately, your submission was removed for breaking the following rule(s):
Your submission was removed for being an obvious joke and therefore not a facepalm.
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