This stuff always makes me mad. I know people mean well but when it's hypothetical and on videos it's all support and love. But when it comes to real life problems and actual suicide none gives a shit about you. And noone cares or wants to do anything to help.
It feels like it's all for show.
I fucking wish I was never born and that I was dead
There are people that genuinely love every single living being. If one of those says "know you're loved", it's not a wrong or hypocritical statement.
However, I agree that 1. many people just say that for virtue signaling and don't actually love all life and 2. if that love is not physically felt, like you say, by family or friends that actually interact with you, it might as well not exist.
People that love all life unfortunately can't just go around and show the same amount of love to everyone. But they do exist and they do vote for the good stuff. Unfortunately, they are not even close to a majority.
Love given equally to everything is of no value. If everyone is beautiful, then no one is. No one is interested in an alleged affection that they earn simply by existing - that's the most insulting and egregious participation medal I've ever heard of.
The question is, how do you define love? For me, that is caring about someone's well-being and feeling a loss when they would be gone.
I can honestly say that is true for me when I think about you, MasterBeeble. Not a lot, obviously, since I barely know you. And that might change once I get to know you and you turn out to be a terrible person. But I think that the average person tries to do good where they can and tries to be nice to others. People like that are of value to me, I care about their well-being and I'd be sad if they were gone. Since you're currently the average person to me, that applies to you.
If that truly is insulting to you, I would find that very sad and I can't quite understand it, but I do respect it. For me, it would be good if someone cared about me, no matter how little. Currently, I care about you enough to have a friendly conversation with you and hopefully make your day a little better. Obviously, if this isn't the case and I'm insulting you with these feelings I have, I truly am very sorry and hope we can just go our separate ways.
In my opinion, assuming people's traits based on your perception of the world average, and then "loving" them for those traits you've so mechanically assigned to them, is quite possibly the furthest thing from love imaginable. "People like that are of value to [you]", and yet what you value is an archetype you've created yourself, in your head, to please yourself. Whatever value you derive from that can't possibly be related to the essence of the other person.
Even if we were to assume your every assumption about human nature to be true, I would wager the vast majority of suicidally depressed people aren't interested in being loved merely because they're human. They'd probably rather that if anyone cared, that they cared because of who they are exactly. What they would find offensive about your love, is that many of them would think (or realize) that love unrelated to who they are is the only kind they can solicit. It would be like your only Christmas present being the free food sample at Cosco - you wouldn't be thrilled about it, the new perspective would actually crush you.
You obviously don't have to agree with my perspective, but if you do find yourself interacting with someone whom you suspect is seriously contemplating suicide, please don't inundate them with your supposedly vast affection (unless you know them well enough that they might believe you). You're much more likely to drive them deeper down than you are to help them, at least with that approach.
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u/LavendarAmy Aug 13 '21
This stuff always makes me mad. I know people mean well but when it's hypothetical and on videos it's all support and love. But when it comes to real life problems and actual suicide none gives a shit about you. And noone cares or wants to do anything to help.
It feels like it's all for show.
I fucking wish I was never born and that I was dead