r/technicallythetruth • u/D0NW0N Technically Flair • 10d ago

Well damn

Post image
42k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

311

u/Psartryn 10d ago

Your argument also holds water.

46

u/Pelileven 9d ago

Like one would say, it's waterproof.

-2

u/AbberageRebbitor 9d ago

I’m going to be totally honest brotato, this just isn’t the funny. As I would say it’s “not laugh, didn’t funny.” As a connoisseur of jokes and a highly intellegint person I request you ebbit your comment to make it “the funny” have a nice day.

30

u/GamerFluff27 9d ago

Don’t downvote this guy, it’s what he wants. Instead, bring him as close as possible to 0 votes. He’s a downvote farmer who just wants attention

11

u/Mc_domination 9d ago

For a downvotes farmer he has quite a lot of upvotes

2

u/georgesorosbae 9d ago

I read somewhere that downvotes on a comment only count to -10 from your total karma but all the upvotes count

3

u/ME_Anime 9d ago

What does he get out of getting downvotes tho? Not being able to talk in subreddits, sure. Just like people asking to get banned and such, give em what they want and it’s not your problem anymore.

3

u/butterymix 9d ago

Trolls from 4chan are migrating

2

u/georgesorosbae 9d ago

They’ve always been here

5

u/NickyNick50 9d ago

bait doesnt work when its painfully obvious sorry man

5

u/Psartryn 9d ago

I wasn't going for funny; I was going for witty and or entertaining. You didn't find it funny, and I assume you didn't find it witty, but we know I was entertaining. You were so excited you sucked your own dick in the comments section..

425

u/drumsXgaming 10d ago

Ah. I sea.

87

u/SketchyLurker7 9d ago

...said the blind man as he took a look.

32

u/ShelZuuz 9d ago edited 9d ago

Said the blind man to the deaf at the corner of the round table.

5

u/LooseTea8299 9d ago

Said the blind man, to his deaf son

7

u/Adanta47 9d ago

As the deaf son wrote to his dyslexic friend

1

u/22zaram111 9d ago

As his dyslexic friend messaged his ADHD friend

1

u/MrSmthn 9d ago

As the friend with ADHD tried to ta... SQUIRREL!

0

u/ItsWediTurtle77 9d ago

r/boneappletea perhaps? Or did you mean death personified?

3

u/No-Pie-6321 9d ago

How many versions of this are there? Growing up, I learned "...said the blind man, as he picked up his hammer and saw," which I think is a cute pun, but the hubs learned it as "...said the blind man to his wife, Crystal." He maintains that his way makes more sense.

3

u/SketchyLurker7 9d ago

My Grandfather always used to say "I see said the blind man as he took a look" or you'd ask how he was doing and he'd say "redhot and still heating" or my favorite "Never felt better and had less". I miss him dearly every day. RIP Papa.

3

u/EvetteGray60 9d ago

I think it’s perfect. I love it!” ?

3

u/zombieshateme 9d ago

Mine was "well Hello Sir!" Every time he greeted someone or he'd answered back with "fair to midlamb"

1

u/No-Pie-6321 9d ago

I have an ex who says "fair to midland."

9

u/Le_Mug 9d ago

There was not much of a pool of options.

2

u/hiva- 9d ago

dude, just drop it

6

u/Master_Baiter- 9d ago

I see your Bottled up emotions got the best of you.

1

u/ImAOneTrackLover 9d ago

It's okay, just let the tears flow.

7

u/CAPITALRIOT 9d ago

Ice sea.

You fool. You foolish fool.

4

u/drumsXgaming 9d ago

Dam. Missed out on this. Am such a pool.

3

u/CAPITALRIOT 9d ago

I'm calling the dad police.

3

u/drumsXgaming 9d ago

The dad pool-ice? That’s cold.

1

u/Absolutely-Aunix 9d ago

...said the blind man to the deaf/mute over the disconnected telephone.

34

u/Mountain-Shelter 9d ago

well dam*

6

u/J41M13 9d ago

Came here to upvote this. Irks me more than it should

87

u/CheesyDanny 10d ago

Does a well “hold” water? Or is it a hole in the ground that leads to a source of underground water?

34

u/twowheeledfun 9d ago

It holds a pool of water for you to dip the bucket in, filled from groundwater.

81

u/D0NW0N Technically Flair 10d ago

Yes.

12

u/LeLBigB0ss 9d ago

Well has many definitions. Well can mean a source that can be drawn on as needed. Well can mean the area where a bartender keeps frequently ordered items behind the bar.

2

u/Skyrim_For_Everyone 9d ago

Most hole in the ground wells have rocks to hold the water away from the dirt, so yes

2

u/Retard_Decimator69 9d ago

A well does not hold water. It's just access to water. A cistern holds water.

3

u/Veauxdeeohdoh 9d ago

That’s not an argument that’s a disagreement.

2

u/Ohafosutina 9d ago

I think it’s technically the truth

1

u/Veauxdeeohdoh 9d ago

I was trying for Monty Pythons sketch where he wants an argument but doesn’t get one....that’s not an argument that’s a disagreement.....

1

u/AussieOsborne 9d ago

A sieve placed in a swamp still holds water until you remove it. Since you can't really remove a well, it holds water

59

u/psychpopnprogncore 10d ago

*dam

27

u/DimesOHoolihan 10d ago

Idk why someone downvoted you. You're right, he would say well dam.

10

u/psychpopnprogncore 10d ago

thats how people say "i disagree" when theyre too much of a puss puss to say so even behind a keyboard

6

u/MeesterCartmanez 9d ago

"so even behind a keyboard!"

4

u/zDarkraii 10d ago

Probably because it was a dad joke, and i guess people didnt like you said that?

4

u/psychpopnprogncore 10d ago

people can 'not like' my butthole lips planted firmly on their face lips. idgaf. its happening

8

u/DimesOHoolihan 9d ago

Bro, I'm on your side in this, but if your butthole has lips you might want to get that checked out.

2

u/ImAOneTrackLover 9d ago

It's called hemorrhoids, and they are beautiful. Put a little lipstick on them, and you got a new french kissing partner.

1

u/psychpopnprogncore 9d ago

my doctor says its just fine and even a little kinky

7

u/DimesOHoolihan 9d ago

I also think you need to find a new doctor.

2

u/P_SG 9d ago

Technically the (actual) truth

3

u/1kings2214 9d ago

r/technicallythetruth

Oh wait. That's this sub.

5

u/eldritchBat 10d ago

Pools are perfect for holding water

2

u/BigBanggBaby 9d ago

Don’t you ever tell me how to live my life again.

1

u/eccureuil 9d ago

oceans are better

1

u/eldritchBat 9d ago

It was a reference to a movie

18

u/meticulouslyweird 10d ago edited 9d ago

I which I could give this two upvotes cause I learned two English words that I didn't know at all

4

u/Tablondemadera 9d ago

Know* cuz of "didn't"

If its a joke I didn't got it. XD

2

u/meticulouslyweird 9d ago

Well, shit then. Cause I wrote it like that at first and thinking that it was wrong I edited it. Are sure that's the correct grammar? If so what's the general rule?

5

u/Tablondemadera 9d ago

Yes, "didn't" takes care of the past tense, you dont have to also change the verb

Also, in my first response I should put "get", I have "got" as a joke

3

u/meticulouslyweird 9d ago

Haha, you're a nerdy piece of crap you know that? But thanks lol

(No offense)

2

u/Tablondemadera 9d ago

XD None taken

3

u/Risu_The_Tengu 10d ago

A mouth and an asshole.

5

u/MeesterCartmanez 9d ago

your comment reminded me of this joke

Stanley died in a fire and his body was burned pretty badly. The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Cooter and Gomer. The three men had always done everything together.

Cooter arrived first, and when the mortician pulled back the sheet, Cooter said, 'Yup, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll him over.' The mortician rolled him over and Cooter said, 'Nope, ain't Stanley.'

The mortician thought this was rather strange. So he brought Gomer in to confirm the identity of the body. Gomer looked at the body and said, 'Yup, he's pretty well burnt up. Roll him over.' The mortician rolled him over and Gomer said, 'No, it ain't Stanley '

The mortician asked, 'How can you tell?'

Gomer said, 'Well, Stanley had two assholes.'

'What? He had two assholes?' asked the mortician.

'Yup, we never seen 'em, but everybody used to say: 'There's Stanley with them two assholes.'

3

u/Risu_The_Tengu 9d ago

Lol that's awesome

3

u/BigMacRedneck 9d ago

Glass cup

3

u/Narwhalballs 9d ago

I’ll have to Pond er that.

3

u/D0NW0N Technically Flair 9d ago

Did you flounder

2

u/alexanderhameowlton 9d ago

Image Transcription: Twitter

Dad Jokes, @Dadsaysjokes

Someone asked me to name 2 structures that hold water.

I was like well damn.

I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!

2

u/DualKG 9d ago

Damn it, he’s cheated the system

2

u/masschock99 9d ago

That wasn't hard. Lake sea this guy, he's smart.

2

u/Familiar-Increase440 9d ago

Distilled dad joke. Use with caution.

2

u/DulayZee 9d ago

This person is trying to act like they hold a reservoir of answers; They need to understand, they’re not living in a tower above us all..

3

u/Macgyver1300l 10d ago

A well and a dam 🙃

3

u/randomreddittag 9d ago

Uh, he only got 1

1

u/Saint_Link 9d ago

There’s a sub for dad jokes

1

u/Isaac-the-careless 9d ago

SCP-504 was recorded to reached near light speed, the entire testing chamber will need thorough cleaning

1

u/Jrsonic_yt 9d ago

I REALLY hate dad jokes

1

u/NegativeX2thePurple 9d ago

Well damn causeway to delta-eriorate my sea-rits

1

u/PotatoDonki 9d ago

Considering he decided to put the N on there, this doesn’t actually fit the sub. Should’ve left it off.

1

u/LucidCharchon 9d ago

Let that sink in.

1

u/WaveCat656 9d ago

hey a dad joke that didnt immediately make me scream

1

u/Jetster_B 9d ago

I hold water and so do you so that’s technically 3 things.

1

u/hntddt1 9d ago

Well, well well

1

u/wannabananaa 9d ago

I the upvote, I hate this

1

u/chappaeye 9d ago

I see your well damn and raise you to well damn dike.

1

u/shortordercook 9d ago

Urn urn urn urn urn

1

u/TheTackleZone 9d ago

I would nevia duct a question like this.

1

u/RoscoMan1 9d ago

Well yes but actually, yes

1

u/Fernbergle 9d ago

Ugh. This is terrible. How does it have so many likes?

1

u/xjonleex 9d ago

Didn't bog you down.

1

u/yourmindwavers 9d ago

Neither of these hold water

0

u/Gohzio 9d ago

[to] hold: to set aside; reserve or retain:

Yes, yes they do.

1

u/yourmindwavers 9d ago

Hold definition: to enclose and keep in a container or within bounds. Webster dictionary

1

u/Gohzio 9d ago

Even in the Webster dictionary it is there, I don't know why you're not looking at all the definitions. Just keep holding onto your ignorance my guy.

1

u/yourmindwavers 9d ago

It is not. A well provides access to a water source. It does not restrict or prevent water from leaving silly goose

1

u/Car-man01 9d ago

That dam was built by old man Dodd.

1

u/QuarantineSucksALot 9d ago

Nah m8 dat’s a damn near crime

1

u/ThreeHeadedUnicorn 9d ago

People in this sub are stupid

1

u/adam_demamps_wingman 9d ago

Too bad he wasn’t Canadian. A threefer.

“I was like well damn, hoser.”

1

u/ZippZappZippty 9d ago

Well shit. Good luck never going to change

1

u/TheVokos 9d ago

"Pick up that can"

1

u/Omni9000000 9d ago

You see I know Damn well

1

u/Rude_Journalist 9d ago

Well, in the end though

1

u/ZippZappZippty 9d ago

Well I eat junk all the time loops.

1

u/createdtoaskqstns 9d ago

Pushes up glasses Except it'd be "well dam" Mic drop

1

u/memegod40 9d ago

I GET IT

1

u/Rewiistdummlolxd 9d ago

He dOeSnT EvEn kNoW 2 TyPeS oF wAtEr CoNtAiNiNg sTrUcTuReS xXxXxDdDdDd

1

u/waybey0nd 9d ago

Why would anyone ask u that?

1

u/douknodawae1 9d ago

Jackie I don't control the weather

1

u/Syllabub-Temporary 9d ago

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/l1zrd 9d ago

One of my fav insta's, bad joke t-rex too.

1

u/Scineron222 9d ago

I am going to 100% steal that joke.

1

u/Travelar777 9d ago

Well don't hold water they give you access to groundwater

1

u/whoopsfyl 9d ago

Somebody should put this in r/wellthathappened

1

u/Axman6 9d ago

Well dam son, here’s three.

1

u/TheSpawnDude 9d ago

Are bro crazy dumb eat food get home it just keen

1

u/Albatross767 9d ago

Good to see you here dad

1

u/QuarantineSucksALot 9d ago

When he fell off a damn ball

1

u/KenKanekislefteye 9d ago

Any Percy Jackson fans here? Cause DAMn 😅😅

1

u/Juli_fn 9d ago

u/repostsleuthbot

1

u/RepostSleuthBot 9d ago

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/technicallythetruth.

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1

u/regodless 9d ago

Did you hear about the three holes in the ground? Well, well, well.

1

u/PrincessSelphine 9d ago

This confused me for a moment till I remembered what a well and a dam was... I feel stupid now

1

u/YaBoiCowman 9d ago

I hate that I laughed at that.

1

u/Figbud 9d ago

technically that's wrong because dam is spelt differently to damn if i remember correctly, but in a spoken conversation it's accurate

1

u/MeroMute 9d ago

I like the joke but it was enough to make me slam my phone on the table

1

u/Science_Maniac 9d ago

You damn well knwo what it is

1

u/stijndielhof123 9d ago

So what was it then?

1

u/Smarty7752 9d ago

Ohhh cean-t. Ill see myself out