When I signed up for a Safeway club card a million years ago, I put that my name was Zapp Brannigan. In all the years of using it, exactly one person ever commented on it. The rest said “Have a nice day, Mrs Brannigan” which is like a whole new layer of joke.

I teach high school, and a few years ago I suddenly realized I didn’t know who ANY of their celebrities are.

She wrote passionate letters to women whose writing she admired? 110% gay confirmed.

I hate MLMs because they prey on our innate hunger to connect with people and be part of a community. So many of us are so isolated, and there’s a particular isolation of being a mom to young children, that people are willing to go beyond sanity to feel a sense of belonging. It makes me really sad.

I’m definitely not thinking about how to replicate this business model…

Fun fact: milk ducts are modified sweat glands. When a body produces milk, everything else goes crazy too.

I also have switched to Lume after developing sensitivity to basically every other deodorant!

Yes yes yes. I sweat so much and smelled so weird postpartum and breastfeeding. But you know what I did? I got really into showering, with lots of sudsy soap and body wash.

I used to say this a lot while I was pregnant.

Not bees, don’t fret about protecting them.

That was a gift and I am very grateful!

Gingersnap!

Many years ago, my wife and I had just bought our first house and we wanted to decorate for Christmas but didn’t have the money for almost anything. As a joke, I used an empty toilet paper roll and some wrapping paper to make a topper for our tree. We had a good laugh… and then we enjoyed that tree topper, and recycled its components when the season was done. That sparked a tradition of making and enjoying temporary decorations. We’ve made pomanders and ornaments from dried citrus slices and star anise, and composted them afterwards. We made old-school paper chains and filled the entire living room with them. (Those we ended up being too attached to to toss them, so now they get stored.) When our son was 1, he was really into owls, so I cut out pictures from an owl calendar and he and I taped them up by the stockings. The annual fun of making stuff, especially knowing that it’s temporary and therefore low pressure, is magical for us; we slow down and spend time together as a family, and celebrate the moment. When we end up with a decoration that we can’t bear to throw out, we keep it, but mostly we build anew each year.

I recently moved from a house built in the late 40s to one built in the late 30s and it’s been interesting to me just how much of a difference there is in the prewar vs postwar construction. If nothing else, it is nice to know I don’t have to replace another goddamn Orangeburg sewer pipe.

A buddy of mine was over here just yesterday helping us with some repairs and he was commenting on how this house compares to the one he grew up in that was built in the late 19th century. It’s nerdy, but I definitely feel like I have a different perspective on history through living in older houses. Hopefully that’s just not the lead paint talking, though ;)

Late 30s but yeah, basically same here!

You’re gonna be a thousandaire!

Oooof some folks are tightly wound…

OP, these look awesome — they look like scallops! It’s striking! — and the recipe sounds delicious. I’m a joyful omnivore and I’d absolutely eat these and be intrigued by them being called scallops!

The best trick the rich have pulled is getting that middle guy to write shit like this.

I’m so proud of you for being so brave, and so sorry you’re going through something so painful. You’re still completely valid and I hope whatever your friend needs to go through to feel happy, they can figure it out without hurting you!

In my observation, dudes who think they are basically real-life Tony Stark are completely insufferable.

When I was 17, I found a winning scratch-off on the ground. It was only for like 40 bucks, but it was still a weird situation to be in. I had my mom cash it in for me, and I remember us arguing about if she got a cut of the winnings or not.

Surprise me?

As a high school teacher, I just have to say it’s bold of you to assume Jon retained anything Luwin tried to teach him

It is pre-successful

For me, having a kid was the root of my awakening against capitalism. I like playing with my kid, and can’t believe that’s not an option.