One day I saw advertised these birdhouses with little accordion-like appendages, the same kind most air conditioners have that allow them to fit into windows, and I bought several of these, one per window. On the side facing the outdoors, birds find a little hole and can venture inside, as is typical of a birdhouse. On the side facing the inside of my home, the same birdhouses have tiny windows, like those one-way viewers hotel doors have, that allow anyone to see into the birdhouses, as well as the secretly built option to open it like a door, either while no bird is inside (makes cleaning them easy) or, if someone for some reason felt devious (I wouldn’t, and would never give anyone the key to said birdhouse doors), while a bird was in there, which would force it to honor the will of the owner of the home with all the said birdhouses (again, I would never use this feature, unless maybe a bird was injured or something and needed help).

Alright, with all that said… while I have no plans to ditch any of the birdhouses, I will admit I’ve received complaints that the combination of a few dozen birdhouses in unison is noisy in the morning, like you wake up at six in the morning and it sounds like the birdie house of commons. People say such bird hospitality is unbecoming of an inn attendant. Is it though? Is it? That said, this is usually when the noise cancellers aren’t working.