My cat loves to be a bongo, there is nothing in the world he loves so much as to have his bum bomped. So rather than lie in my lap or rub his cheek against my hand when he wants attention, he sticks his butt in my face instead. If my face is inaccessible, he makes sure his butt is by my hand or arm so he’s constantly in the way if I’m on the computer or working with my hands. If he’s near me his butt is pointed towards me. He’s a handsome boy so it’d be nice to see the other side of him sometimes.

Old story, may not qualify. Something like 30ish years ago when I was but a young lad, I had some stuffed animals on a shelf that my dad had won from the claw machine on bowling nights. That takes dedication right there. Anyway one was a small, slightly fuzzy brown dog.

The cat decided to “this is mine now” with it and her preferred hiding place was under the parents’ bed. My mother world constantly find it when cleaning, give it back, and tell me to put it away. Cat came back and took it again. Every. Single. Time.

Eventually I just gave up and let her keep it. My mom had to restitch the neck several times because that’s where cats grab kittens when carrying them around.

There was a room in my parents house we would close off before leaving. Somehow our cat would always hide somewhere in that room moments before we had to leave and refuse to come out.

Our 15 year old has a new habit of coming into the kitchen every time we do, and stretching out directly in the middle of the walkway so he is in the way at all times. We have a pretty decent sized space, but he’s a very long cat when he wants to be. I feel like he defies the laws of physics because I don’t understand how he’s in the way literally everywhere. It makes me crazy.

So when we cook, which is usually 2-3 times a day, it’s like, need to open the oven? Cat. Need to get into the fridge? Cat! Sink? Cat. Oh, I need to dry my hands? Cat. We have definitely stepped on him by accident since he started doing this, but he’s still undeterred. He has bad arthritis, so I don’t mind when he sits in front of the oven when it’s on, because at least that one makes sense. (He has multiple heated beds too; don’t feel bad for him.) But it’s like, I would love to be able to grab water from the kitchen or feed the dog or do literally anything in there without almost stepping on my cat.

I had a cat years ago that apparently thought he was ‘helping’ me by gently removing my glasses by biting the hinge and slowly pulling them off of me. I never could fully break him of that habit either, I just had to make sure he never got close to my face whenever I’d pet him.

Silly kitty! 😹

Melon pees in the bath, Snuggles licks plastic bags, and Franny has chronic snot rockets. I love them all endlessly.

My cat will pick up socks from the dirty sock basket and carry them around in his mouth while yowling. Often this occurs right before he goes to hump something. No idea what the fuck he’s doing, but he leaves the socks everywhere.

We have a rabbit and a cat. The cat has been with us longer. Whenever I’m petting the rabbit, the cat comes up and wants to be pet too. And only with the hand I’m already petting the rabbit with. If I try to use my free hand, he’ll ignore it and head bump the hand petting the rabbit.

The cat has needs, but refuses to communicate them without first performing an elaborate bee-style ritual dance/scream-off

E.g. if she wants to drink from the faucet, I have to stand there while she circles and jumps from countertop to countertop for 5 minutes. If I turn on the faucet in advance she will get annoyed at being rushed and reset the entire QuickTime event

Our 17 year old cat (who we’ve had since she was 18 months old) has never had any interest in wet cat food. At best she would lick it the gravy off then walk away. We recently adopted a 4yo who had gotten used to getting wet food in the morning while he was living with a foster.

Now 17yo lady comes to beg for wet food every morning and won’t leave me alone about it. So the wet food gets split between them - he gets briefly shut in a room with his half and she gets to lick her plate in peace. Then 5 minutes later I let him out to come eat the food I gave her.

If she weren’t old and suffering kidney disease I might not be so inclined to humor her.

My cats won’t stop playing in the dirt…