This question is especially for those who have used or are using online dating to meet new people, form relationships, hook up, etc. How do y’all balance the (online) dating scene with your own level of concern regarding privacy/security?

For example, some of these concerns may be that many dating apps are owned by a few companies, dating apps sometimes require linking to sensitive information (real phone number, google accounts, pictures, …), or that they can have vary intrusive trackers, etc

What are the steps you have made to address these concerns, if you have them? Or what are the compromises you have made? How successful are these attempts?

Let me start sharing first (in broad-stroke) about my personal experience. I’m mostly concerned with how my data are handled, transferred between, and used by different services. My concerns usually make using these apps much harder, sometimes even impossible, for example I’m hesitant to share my real phone number to sign up, and I’d prefer to limit my gmail use when possible. But that has also limited my opportunity to meet people online. Though honestly, such interactions have not been meaningful.

I’ve stopped for a while now but thinking of getting back. Just want some perspective on whether it’s worth it, and how I should orient myself with the tradeoffs.

  • Daqu@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    I juse a fake name, a different gender and AI generated pictures. I get a lit of invitations to meet, but refuse due to privacy concerns.

  • miss_brainfart@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    There is no being private in online dating, it defeats the whole point. Sure, you can use an email alias, maybe even a burner number, isolate the app in another profile and so on.

    But at the end of the day, it’s still you you’re putting out there.

  • Tiuku@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    There’s Alovoa but there aren’t many users…
    On the flip side, if you do happen to meet someone there, there’s a high change that they already grasp privacy, FOSS, etc.

    • QuazarOmega@lemy.lol
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      1 year ago

      Is there any review out there? I’d like to see how it works aside from hearing people’s opinion on it

      • Tiuku@sopuli.xyz
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        1 year ago

        No idea but it works along these lines:

        • Make a profile
        • Set what you are looking for. E.g. males, a relationship
        • Browse other compatible profiles
        • Like/dislike
        • People see who has liked them
        • Two persons liking each other can chat
  • EngineerGaming@feddit.nl
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    1 year ago

    I don’t. Having a photo of my face posted online is off-limits already, but it’s on the other level of dangerous when it’s in a place full of horny men. ESPECIALLY when you don’t even look like an adult, it creates a whole other level of creepy. No thanks.

  • auth@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Dont use the app and use the website when possible… This is true for all mobile apps

  • MalReynolds@slrpnk.net
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    1 year ago

    You’re using gmail, you’re already screwed, might as well get laid too. But seriously, look into alias providers like simplelogin and anonaddy, it works for this use case and can smooth the transition away from gmail in the future. At the end of the day you need to make contact with potentials so it can’t be truly private, plus they’ll be mining your data, combining it with facebook shadow profiles etc, it’s technically quite plausible to identify you from that alone. VoIP, aliases and so forth are band-aids. At the end of the day you need to make a choice, is the potential of finding someone worth more than some of your privacy ? Or…

    Consider local hobby groups, hiking, meet-ups and so forth. The so called ‘Third Place’ (other than work and home) is on it’s last legs, but it’s not dead and will hopefully see a resurgence, find and partake in one. Put yourself out there.

  • GregorGizeh@lemmy.zip
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    1 year ago

    I just don’t bother with those sites. They are designed to exploit lonely men for money, with an abysmal success rate.

    Just try and meet women some other way. Your chances of success certainly aren’t lower than online.

    • bionicjoey@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      My chances of meeting someone IRL are definitely lower than online, but congrats on being neurotypical my dude.