In my teen years and 20s I was a skinny dude, broom legs and arms and flat torso, I’m also very tall for a latino so made it more noticeable. But now that I’m on my mid 30s and that anything that I drink or eat is getting harder to “digest” I’m now overweight, still skinny limbs but with a protruding belly, like majority of Latinos here (we don’t believe in diets) and I don’t care anymore.
I was worried about my look as a kid but then realised that I wasn’t going to do anything with it, I’m not a model or role model for anything, unfortunately I will not be able to have my own family and I’m hoping to have a short lifespan so my health isn’t something that I care that much, don’t give a shit about my life tbh.
There’s a certain sensation of solace with that realisation accompanied by depression, then pain, but hey, life sucks after all, took me 30 years to get there.
It’s not about being in your thirties. What you are experiencing is depression.
You’re rationalizing and justifying your depression by associating it with age and portraying it as an unavoidable rite of passage. I don’t say this to try and change the course of your life, I just think it’s worth addressing your demons by their real names. It makes everything a lot easier, even if you really do decide in the end not to fight them.
Just my 2c, wishing all the best to you
Ok thanks