Some of the many species Jeffrey Combs has evolved into:

  • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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    13 hours ago

    For someone who gives this much of a shit about gender roles, you’d think they’d learn the correct forms of the word for an intended spouse.

  • TheGrandNagus@lemmy.world
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    15 hours ago

    My wife took my name, but I would not give the slightest shit if she didn’t, which I made clear to her at the time.

    We briefly discussed having a double-barrel surname, but writing that out would be a mild inconvenience that neither of us want.

  • S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    15 hours ago

    What a narrow view. In other many places things are different and they function you know. In Brazil kids get the mother’s surname.

  • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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    18 hours ago

    My maiden name was awful to have. Other people liked it because it looked cool, but it was a hassle for everything even in the US, where at least part of it was well known. I then moved to Germany, where it was just totally foreign.

    My married name is under three syllables (vs more than eight), easy to spell, and sounds as German as possible. My husband would have loved to take my last name, but we couldn’t do it the way we wanted to (German naming laws 🙃). I would really have liked to at least have been able to keep my maiden name as a middle name, but alas.

    I still feel very weird (about a year out) about it, but there are way more good feelings than bad.

    However, it’s really annoying that people now assume I’m German. I put in a shit load of work to learn German well as an adult, and my strongest skill is in pronunciation. That combined with my name means people think I’m just a native German who’s bad at grammar, and they don’t correct me anymore.

    I always wanted to blend in as a native, I just didn’t think about the middle stretch where I just seem a bit dumb to others, both because of the language and cultural things that people now expect me to know (I thought it was called handkäse because you can eat the little rounds straight from the hand, no need for bread, until last year).

    • quafeinum@lemmy.world
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      11 hours ago

      German here. Took my wife’s name because she has publications and I don’t. I have no idea what you are talking about. In Germany any partner can take the others name in a marriage or even have a compound name (maiden name - new name). My father took my mother’s name, they divorced 20 years ago, now my father is going to change his name back to his old name. My sister married her girlfriend, she took her name. Idk at this point it kinda became our internal family joke thing although our last name wasn’t that horrible

      • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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        11 hours ago

        I already had a compound name, and we both have middle names, which are the relevant problems to combining our names the way we wanted.

        In Germany, you can’t have a twice hyphenated name (not that I wanted one), nor can you use that hyphenated name as an additional middle name, if you already have one.

        • quafeinum@lemmy.world
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          7 hours ago

          Ah ok thanks for explaining. That makes sense that although they redid the law that there’s still idiotic shit I it that doesn’t work in real life.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      18 hours ago

      I have a German surname, but my family changed the pronunciation to sound lest German during WWII so now Germans pronounce it “wrong” and no one else can pronounce it at all.

      • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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        17 hours ago

        I read most of my news, so it took about a month to realize the VP candidates last name was pronounced “Walls,” so you’re among company.

        I’m from Connecticut, which has a town called Berlin, pronounced BURR-lun (/‘bərlən/). That , like the pronunciation of many German-origin names, was changed during WWII, but it’s basically a shibboleth for locals now, like Houston Street.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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          17 hours ago

          I’m in Indiana and half of our place names are pronounced incorrectly.

          Ver-sayles (Versailles)
          Rooshaville (Russiaville)
          Pee-ru (Peru) Kay-roh (Cairo)

          And, of course, we’re the home of the University of Note’r Daym.

          • stringere@sh.itjust.works
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            8 hours ago

            Saint Louis would like some words:

            Bellefontaine (BELL-fountain)

            Cabanne (CAB-a-knee)

            Chouteau (SHOW-toe)

            Carondelet (kron-duh-let)

            Cote Brilliante (coat BRILL-yunt)

            DeTonty (duh-TON-tee)

            Dougherty Ferry (DOOR-uh-tee ferry)

            DeBaliviere (duh-BALL-uh-ver)

            Goethe (GO-thee)

            Gravois (GRAV-oy)

            Gratiot (GRASH-it)

            Hodiamont (HOAD-uh-mont)

            Juniata (june-ee-AH-tuh)

            Kossuth (KOSS-ooth)

            Laclede (lah-CLEED)

            Spoede (SPAY-dee)

            Tesson Ferry (TESS-on ferry)

            Zumbehl (ZUM-bull)

    • mipadaitu@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Hot tip, change HIS last name prior to the wedding and she gets the name change free.

      I know a couple that waited until after the wedding to do that and the husband changed his name, then the wife was given the option of keeping her old name, or switch to his old name.

      She ended up having to go through the entire name change process without the benefit of the auto-name flip from the marriage.

      • Norah - She/They@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        17 hours ago

        This is really interesting, because in my state in Australia, this process isn’t gendered at all. The man can take the woman’s name just as easily, same with same-sex marriages.

      • iknowitwheniseeit@lemmynsfw.com
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        1 day ago

        Warning: Taken from decades-old memories of things that I wasn’t involved in or paying much attention to! Anyway…

        In Virginia a man sued the state like 30 years ago because they wanted to charge him to change his name, when a woman could change her name free when she got married. The state could either have charged women or made it free for all. They chose the later.

      • bitchkat@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        I’m pretty sure both of us had the option of changing our names when we got married and when we got divorced.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOPM
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      1 day ago

      I’ve known other people who do that.

      I just feel like any name change that you don’t need (i.e. you’re transitioning) is just more bother than it’s worth.

      • BradleyUffner@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Yeah, that’s what we are running into. The marriage forms here in NC make it simple to take the husband’s last name as part of the process, but any other kind of change requires a lot of crazy, expensive, and time consuming steps.

  • ShaunaTheDead@fedia.io
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    2 days ago

    Women, don’t marry men who won’t take your name. That’s a wall of separation he wants to keep between you. It won’t be the only one.

    • TheLowestStone@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I took my wife’s name when we got married. I hate my family and intended to change my last name anyway. Her family is awesome. It was an easy choice.

      • Psythik@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        I plan on doing the same. My dad Americanized my family’s last name, and because my girlfriend is the same ethnicity as him, I plan on taking her name to undo the damage and go back to my roots.

      • ShaunaTheDead@fedia.io
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        1 day ago

        I’m assuming you’re a man, and that’s great! I’m also taking my wife’s name but I’m a gay woman so it’s not as awesome lol

        • TheLowestStone@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          Yes, I am a man. I do just generally think it’s awesome that you’re getting married. I remember when that wasn’t allowed in the USA.

    • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      And don’t marry a man who insists you take his. That’s a wall of control he’s building around you and he won’t stop until he’s separated you from everyone and everything you love. Marry the man who accepts it’s your choice to decide, along with every other decision about yourself.

      • ShaunaTheDead@fedia.io
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        1 day ago

        I’ve already found my Shaun of the Dead, it’s Simon Pegg; unfortunately though, he’s taken… and I’m a gay woman. In another lifetime perhaps, Simon!

  • BenVimes@lemmy.ca
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    1 day ago

    There are lots of reasons for women to keep their maiden name. In the case of my wife, she had two good ones:

    1. She didn’t want to become disassociated from her scientific publications.

    2. She didn’t want to complicate or redo any immigration paperwork.

    • LillyPip@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      My ex took my last name, because he had siblings with children and my family name would have died with me. It was a gift to my father that his* grandson would carry the family name forwards. And no, that wasn’t a red flag – we were married for 30 years.

    • Wrench@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago
      1. Who cares

      I’ll admit when I was in my early 20s, it was a point of contention with one girl I was dating. I was young and stupid, my mom took my dad’s name, etc.

      But by 30, wiser, less prone to drama, I was solidly in the “who cares, do what makes you happy” crowd.

      My wife kept her last name. It’s easier, and less confusing for her clients and networking.

      Grow the fuck up. Stop being so needy and insecure. It’s a bad look.

  • Pickle_Jr@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 day ago

    There are tons of reasons why one might not want to change their name. At a minimum you have to send a form to the state, update any licenses you have, contact your banks, your insurance, your place of work… Best case scenario it’s an annoying hassle to deal with.

    Was I appreciative when my wife took my name? Sure. But that’s mostly because we also share the same first name so it’s hilarious to share the same last name. But I told her many times before we got married she didn’t need to do it. I never expected that out of her.

    If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.

    • ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.

      ‘Why should I have to change? He’s the one who sucks!’ -Michael Bolton

    • Rubanski@lemm.ee
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      1 day ago

      You both share three same first name as well? That sounds very confusing for your peers

    • garibaldi_biscuit@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      It seems reasonable for each partner to continue to use their original family name if they want to, even if it’s only the husband’s name on the marriage certificate.

      If you go down the legally hyphenated name path, after a few generations, this could potentially devolve to family names like: Jones-Smith - Smythe-Johns - Longbottom-Allcock - Junior III (etc).

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Yeah my wife has agreed that taking my name would be nice, but it’s a pain in the ass. And omg yes I love your attitude. Part of why I wanted to share a last name is so we can be Ms. and Mrs. Lastname.

  • SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org
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    21 hours ago

    I just see it as a hassle. Like why even bother? She would have to explain why she wants to take my name and I would try talking her out of it “What if we get a divorce in 7 years or so? Do you just have to change it back then?” I’m sure that would go over well

  • ChicoSuave@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    It’s heart warming to see Jeffrey Combs is an incredible actor with good taste in the company he keeps. It’s exciting seeing him vocally shouting down the fascists.

    • EmpathicVagrant@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I read the comment in his slimy “Brunt- FCA” tone the way he addresses Quark. I loved him already but seeing this just makes him so much more respectable and admirable.

      Heartwarming is a lovely way to put it.

    • RBWells@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      So is it a red flag, then, that my husband did not take my last name? And if it’s a gay couple, which one is complaining?

    • RoidingOldMan@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      I’m more surprised that he took the time to use an accent mark. Either a copy-paste to make sure he got it right, or lots of extra time changing his keyboard back and forth.

      • Psythik@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        If they’re not on their phone (which they probably are as others have pointed out), maybe they’re just a Pokémon fan. I memorized the keyboard combo for the accented “é” about 25 years ago because of this. (Alt+130)

        • fakeman_pretendname@feddit.uk
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          I never interacted with Pokemon (i think I was a few years too old for it) - but I used to have to write a lot of international names down for work related reasons, and therefore eventually had all the accented letter win-alt-key codes memorised - though I can’t really remember them all now (I’ve used Linux only for about 15 years).

          I don’t think I’d remember many now - for example, I was convinced é was ALT+0233, but I could easily be mixing it up with one of the others.

        • RoidingOldMan@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          Most people use twitter on their phone. I tend to assume everyone on twitter is on a phone. The vertical screenshots give it away.

  • magnetosphere@fedia.io
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    1 day ago

    I think it’s safe to say that Walsh knows a lot about women maintaining “walls of separation”. Maybe even restraining orders.

  • Mango@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    What the fuck makes my name any better than hers? Fuck my name. I don’t even want it.

          • Joeffect@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            Oh, how progressive! Why, back in my day, we just thrilled at the excitement of folding laundry and baking pies all day. But you, dear, you’ve truly broken boundaries. Imagine—your wife letting you take her last name and do whatever you want! Why, next thing we know, she might let you wear trousers too.

            Give her my regards; she sounds like quite the visionary!

        • MintyAnt@lemmy.world
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          23 hours ago

          Did you try taking discommendation, being expelled from the empire, brain wiping your brother and only living relative, and impressing her in combat during shared captivity in an enemy camp? If it works for worf…